A Piece in My Mind

Why Did I Donate My Hair

2008-11-10T19:18:00.000-08:00

Before

As some of you know yesterday I cut off 9" of my hair to donate to Beautiful Lengths. Some of you might be wondering how I came to the decision to do this? There are many answers actually. The first is I'm cheap. I normally cut my hair to between my chin and my shoulders then let it grow to 2-3" below my shoulders and repeat. This is truly because I am too cheap to pay for more regular haircuts. But being cheap is not enough to get 9" extra inches of hair. No, there's also the fact that around May when I should have gotten a haircut I was working an insane number of hours. So when I finished work later than normal at night I never really had the time to sit and wait to get a haircut. That ties into the next reason, I don't like people or to be more specific, I don't like being around people I don't know. Not that people could tell that based on how much I'm on twitter or plurk or how I podcast and spend hours in after shows. So my natural tendency to avoid crowds and strangers kept me from getting my haircut. Next we have vanity. Not that I consider myself to be terribly vain more to the contrary actually. However in the middle of July I was getting ready to go to the Girls Night In Podcast (now the new show is Girls Night In Radio) Meet up. For the first time I would be meeting listeners of the show. I knew how I liked to do my hair with it longer and I wasn't sure about how I would do it short. So I decided I'd wait until after the meet up. Around the time I returned home I started thinking about donating my hair. I had heard of Locks of Love and checked out the requirements. At the time I had about 7" to cut. Locks of Love requires 10" to donate. I honestly had no idea how long it takes hair to grow and at that point I decided to let it grow so I could donate it.

So the months went by and my hair continued to grow. This is where we run into the problem. I have a very large head, as in I don't actually know anyone who has a larger one. It's so big I can't wear hats and I have problems getting hooded sweatshirts over it. I also have very thick hair so combine the two, and I have a ton of hair which gets really heavy for my easily aggravated neck (I get tension headaches so bad they become migraines without proper medication). Several weeks back I started getting pain in my neck from the weight of my hair. Around that same time I was watching Ellen and she had Hilary Swank on sporting a new short do. She talked about how she had given her beautiful hair to Beautiful Lengths. They make wigs for women with cancer. It turns out 58% of women who are diagnosed with cancer list losing their hair as their number one fear and that's over fear of dying. In fact 8% will decide not to have chemo or other treatments for fear of losing their hair. That's right, they will forgo a possible life saving treatment because they don't want to lose their hair. The donated hair is made into wigs for these women to help they decide to do chemo which will hopefully save their lives. The other thing that got me thinking about them is they only require 8" of hair minimum.

I wrestled with if I should continue going for 10" for Locks of Love or do Beautiful Lengths. Both are great causes but in the end the pain in my neck was getting quite bad. I was having tension headaches every single day from the weight of my hair. I had Marty measure my hair and he said I had 8.5"-10", 11" if you counted just the very longest and depending how short I got my hair. I wanted to make sure I had at least an extra inch over the requirement so I decided on Beautiful Lengths. I knew I couldn't wait longer for it to grow a couple extra inches.

After following all the prep instructions I went into the local Great Clips right before close. The stylist had never heard of Beautiful Lengths but said if I were donating to Locks of Love the haircut would be free. I had intended to pay for it so not a big deal but as I told her about the organization she decided not to charge me, she said she wouldn't feel right about it. I thanked her and gave her a huge tip. She also said that most people can get two ponytails out of their hair but she got four from mine! It take 6-8 ponytails to make one wig so my hair will make about 1/2 of a wig!

I guess in the end the answer to the why I donated my hair was because I could.

After

It was actually still damp from the cut and dried right in the middle of my neck.

New Car!

2008-06-03T22:07:00.000-07:00

Car

2008-06-01T20:02:00.000-07:00

"Voters approve ban on gay marriage"

2006-11-07T20:43:00.000-08:00

I find myself deeply saddened tonight. I've always thought of Wisconsin as a state of good, tolerate or even accepting people but tonight they have failed me. While 61.4% isn't an overwhelming majority the shear fact that it's above 10% is alarming to me. It never ceases to amaze me how afraid people are of things or people they don't understand. Some people say they don't have a problem with gay people having equal rights under the law, they just don't want it called marriage, well they just help get Civil Unions Banned as well. I feel future generations will look at these bans and other intolerance towards gays the way most people today look at the way this country used to treat African Americans, as unthinkable. I guess I thought we had made strides in this country since the 80s and 90s but I guess not enough. Can someone find me a state with more love in their hearts so I can move there? I feel disheartened so I'll leave it at this, don't fear people that are different than you accept them, learn from them, and celebrate diversity.

The What character on LOST are you test

2006-07-25T15:47:00.000-07:00

Hurley
You scored 33% Kindness, 60% Confidence, 0% Anger, and 6% Secretness!

Everyone loves you, and you love everyone. You don't get angry, and you're not that secretive (maybe a few things here and there). YOu don't consider yourself brave, but you actually are. You'd put yourself in danger to help save others, and are always trying to help out.

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 48% on Kindness
You scored higher than 82% on Confidence
You scored higher than 0% on Anger
You scored higher than 6% on Secretness

Link: The Lost TV Show character Test written by holybum on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

2006-07-25T14:56:00.000-07:00

Muppet Babies!
You scored 30 Aggression and 65 Silliness!

Creative and funny, you're the Muppet Babies! To be honest, I never watched this show when it was on, but I feel like I missed something special. You have the ability to find magic in everyday situations. You're also not afraid to stand up for what you believe in. Good for you!

My test tracked 2 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 22% on Aggression
You scored higher than 72% on Silliness

Link: The 80s Cartoon Personality Test written by TheLadyEve on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

Firefly

2006-07-24T20:58:00.000-07:00

KAYLEE: Mechanic
You scored 35% roughness, 60% intelligence, and 16% isolated!

Congratulations, you are Kaylee!!!

Kaylee is Serenity's resident mechanic and engineer and is more comfortable in the sky than on the ground.

Kaylee has three passions: engines, strawberries, and Dr. Simon Tam.
She first got her job when she was discovered canoodling(and more) with
the ship's one-track-minded mechanic, Bester.

She fixed the reg couple, which had grounded the ship for half a week and Captain Reynolds was so impressed with her know-how he hired her on the spot, despite her total lack of experience with that model of ship.
She went off to ask her folks, and has been aboard ever since...

Kaylee is irrpresibly cheerful, and has an innate knowledge of machines and how they work.

At the same time, she can be flummoxed by particularly difficult problems ("Sometimes, a thing gets broke, it can't be fixed.") or by someone who sets out to break a machine instead of fix it, which seems a fundamentally foreign concept to her. (As when Saffron sabotages Serenity... twice.)

The crew's occasional forays into crime don't bother her, though she's not much good in a gunfight.

Other Possible Results...

KAYLEE: Mechanic
WASH: Pilot
INARA: Ambassador
SIMON: Doctor
JAYNE: Mercenary
ZOE: Soldier
RIVER: Fugitive
MAL: Captain
SAFFRON
THE OPERATIVE
SHEPHERD

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 4% on roughness
You scored higher than 23% on intelligence
You scored higher than 3% on isolated

Link: The Firefly Character Personality Test written by catdog875woo on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

ABout time... an update

2006-06-15T12:45:00.000-07:00

-Memorial Day weekend Marty & I painted the guest bedroom, dolphin fin grey. It's simple, but we didn't want to offend our guest's eyes. I will be making eggplant purple curtains. We also took up the hidious carpet which revealed the most beautiful hardwood floor, I've seen. They used a special tape to hold i tdown, so there was no damage to the floor. Yippee, no sanding!!! We moved the bed, so there is a scrapbooking area in there for me and we will be moving the treadmill up there once we get an LCD TV. We have to figure out how big of one we will need.

-Starting the following Thursday evening through Saturday the company I work for personalized shirts at the state track meet. On top of working Tuesday and Wednesday more then my normal 8 hours, I put in 40 hours down there. I was tired and then only had a one day weekend. I wish MD was after the meet, not before.

-Last weekend we stayed home and rested. I slept a ton, even more than normal. I napped both days for about 3 hours as well.

-Work has been very busy for 3+ weeks now. Jean, our lady that does about everything (excpet my job of coarse) is gone from yesterday through tomorrow. So things are extra hellish. Yesterday I actually got into a shotting match with a customer. We do their contract printing from the other side of the state. Their customer sent in some art in the right format so all I had to do was print it. When I get art that I don't have to touch, I never send a proof and this ladies' boss (the owner over there) has told me there is no reason to. So yesterday I get this call from her asking who I sent the proof to and I said I didn't know. So she said well we didn't get one and I told her I don't for art like this and she went on about how I redo art and always sent it and I said I didn't redo this art.... Well their customer had mispelled something and that part of all 250 shirts was already printed. So finally she was yelling at me, blaming me and I was so pissed I couldn't speak. Finally I gave her to the owner here. After I calmed down a bit I remembered I had spoken to her boss on this particular order and asked if they needed a proof and he said no. Well so we are paying to redo these shirts including overnight shipping them in, because their customer can't spell. I couldn't even have spell checked the art because the words were in outlines which can't be checked. THe topper is I was still pissed about it and talking to a co-worker and my boss said that I screwed up, which pissed me off even more. So from now with this customer when I get art in the right format I'm going to turn around and email them back their exact file and ask them to check it for mistakes. Does anyone else see how moronic this concept is?!?!?!

Bulbs

2006-05-17T12:14:00.000-07:00

Well it finally stopped raining long enough for me to get the rest of the front lawn bulbs in yesterday. The sun was shining at 4 and I rushed home. The ground was still damp, so I was a little muddy, but not bad. Now I just have to get my annuals in for instant color and then plant the glads along the fence line, but we have to plan the fenc out first. Why are all my hobbies SO much work?

Pop Culture

2006-05-12T12:05:00.000-07:00

I know I don't normally make pop culture posts, but there are 3 pop topics on my mind right now.

1. American Idol: I am SO done with the show now! Chris Daughtry is the best this show has ever had! Just shows you why American Popular music as a whole pretty much sucks and I listen to a lot of people that no one else has heard of. Just ask people that had to try to find something to get me from my birthday list. I need a disclaimer, "You can only get this on Amazon, No one at Best Buy will have a clue who these people are." Chris' band is Absent Element, a garage band which I'm hoping will get a recond deal and stick with the kind of music they have been doing. Don't sell out! Here's their website http://www.absentelement.com/index.php

2. LOST (caution may contain spoilers): I used to think I knew what was going on this show, but ? really raised more questions than it answered. THat plus "The Experience", man my head hurts! I really didn't think Libby was going to die because we never had a flash back for her, but she is going to be Desmond's on the season finally, so maybe we'll get some answers. Poor Hurley though, what a bad first date. I'm SO excited for next week, we get to find out where Micheal was while he was gone and what the heck happened, or at least it seems that way. I have convinced myself that "HE" is Walt, don't ask me why. If that is the case though, I'm going back to my very first theory about the whole thing, although the Hanso foundation through that all out of wack. I'll stop now, I could go on for hours.

3. Sims 2 Pets EP: I was actually on the Sims 2 site yesterday and came across info about the teaser video for the Pets EP! If it comes to be I'm going to be SO happy. I about leap out of my chair when I found out about it! I haven't been this excited since I found out that the Sims 2 itself was coming out. More details still to come! Hopefully soon too. http://thesiddog.com/e3/e32006blog_day1_pets.html

Good News for me, Bad news for Gwyn

2006-05-03T12:52:00.000-07:00

So a couple monthes ago my ipod mini battery completey died after less than a year. Luckily, I had gotten a replacement plan at Best Buy (the sales man told us that ipod batteries don't last so a plan was definately worth the money), but I couldn't find the paperwork. Monday night I looked in my filing cabinet and there it was, what a strange place to keep it hu? So yesterday, which was my birthday ehem to those who missed it, I went to BB after work and told the lady about what was going on, and that is was complicated because they don't make the mini anymore. After a few minutes of talking to someone she came back to tell me that I was getting a credit for the full amount paid for it! Yippeee!!! ALso I had just gotten a nice birthday check from my in-laws a couple days earlier. So over to the MP3 players and I went and picked out my very own ipod video!!! I still had to pay some on it, but not as much and I got the plan for this one too. This is bad news for Gwyn who wanted to buy my mini, but you wouldn't have wanted to pay to replace the battery plus buy it from me. Marty said he'd sell you his when he is done with it, which he is waiting for the next generation of ipod video with a bigger screen. And no we won't playing whoever finds the ipod first gets it.

2006-04-24T16:40:00.000-07:00

ExtremelyConsiderate
You scored 46 for Consideration!

You are a very considerate person, but still human. This is a nice mix.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 58% on Consideration

Link: The How Considerate Are You? Test written by bloomedlate on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

So Fun!

2006-04-20T11:57:00.000-07:00

Directions: Type in "I love (insert name) because" into Google and copy and paste the first 10 you get. Don't forget the quotes!

(Check out the third one, it's too good!)

I love Rachel because she is the best actress in the world!! She's intelligent, beautiful...she's the best!!

And I Love Rachel because today was her 18th Birthday!!

I love Rachel because she is amazing. and I live with Ian my brother...

I love Rachel because she says things like "books are useful but I don't like them". You know what I say to that? I say, Niiiiice.

I love Rachel because she never got mad at me even though I ate her collectors Mickey Mouse Macaroni and Cheese

I love Rachel because she is so gorgeous and she plays Brenda so perfectly

Ohh yeah, I love rachel, because she is my Valentine. Shes my roomate.

I love rachel, because I feel like I can share just about anything with her and she would be understanding about it. I can be a complete goof and she'll still laugh at my jokes.

I Love rachel because she shares my obsession with bizarre news stories.

"I LOVE RACHEL BECAUSE SHE'S JUST LIKE ME AND WE BOTH RULE AT BEING SLUTS." [info] swayed:, "YO Rachel. You and your great sense of humor ...

Cranky Geek

2006-04-18T12:26:00.000-07:00

No this isn't about the podcast Cranky Geeks although I do enjoy that one. I'm cranky. Why? You ask. Well customers are driving me crazy. It's one of those times when everyone wants a rush job, doesn't want to pay the rush charge, doesn't have the proper artwork and doesn't want to pay artwork charges. This means that not only does the art have to get done right away, but it also means I have to trace the mother loving art. I've gotten so many jpgs and, god forbid, bmp files made in wonderful programs like MS Paint and saved at 72 DPI at like 5 inches square that they want to look good big on their shirts! Now if you aren't a geek and more specifically an imaging geek, you're probably going, "What?" Trust me it looks terrible and is nearly impossible to get anything looking decent from it. Well then they don't understand why they're being charged $25/hr for me to get something that looks good for their shirts when the going rate is $75/hr. So you add all this with the fact that 2 of the 4 people that are normally here during the day aren't today, well it makes things stressfull and me cranky.

Trivia and Spring time

2006-04-14T12:50:00.000-07:00

Well Another year of trivia has come and gone. It was the most fun I've had at trivia in a several years because people stayed calm most of the time and didn't take it too seriously. There were a couple comments I heard directed at me, but I tried to ignore them and not let them bother me. We ended in 9th, which is great. There were some scoring issues because of a computer glitch, so it's hard to say where we actually belonged because we don't know who else was effected. ANyway, I'm happy with the outcome and I'm not going to sweat a place or two. I personally had my best year ever, I was actually able to find some answers first or around the same time as others and had a couple no else did. I know that's nothing compared to some others, but I am happy about it. Maybe another 11 years and I'll actually be good at this. ;) I'm very thankful to Joan and Mary for letting Gwyn, Anthony and I go with them on the trivia stones. It has always been my favorite part of contest and I'm really glad I was really able to do it again. I slept 4 times for 1 hour and 20 minutes each time. I didn't want anyone to wake me up, so I just didn't use the restroom before sleeping and having to pee effectively woke up each time. My proudest moment was when deductive reasoning got us 70 points for Daisy Chain.

I returned home only to find that La Crosse was a good 15 degrees warmer all weekend. That would have been much better for sleeping in. Oh well. My tulips shot up while I was gone and are getting supper close to blooming. Yesterday I got home from work and found that my arch nemisous, the bunny, had eaten the buds off not one, not two, but three of my tulips. I'm going to kill that darn thing! Anyway, my afternoons have consisted of much napping and I only just got my computer set back up last night! Crazy! I haven't been sleeping the best because the explosure to smoke also inflamed my sinuses and causes me to snore, which Marty isn't happy about either. It seems like about a week and it goes away. I was very happy when we got it so the smoke wasn't coming down the stairs directly into the basement. I was very seriously considering leaving trivia after having an asthma attack for the first five hours when the smokers went out. It's just too dangerous. Gotta love having a chronic, potentially deadly, pulmanary condition. I'm thinking next year I might have to give up the spot I've had since it was built. Not only for the smoke, but also because while everyone else was hot, I was freezing because of my rhynolds symdrom. Of coarse I also can't sit too close to anyone that smells like smoke either. I wish I could just trade this body in for one with less problems.

Marty made pizza Sunday night even though I wasn't there, so we would have left overs for lunches. Damn my man can cook! He is the best cook I know (sorry Mom, and everyone else that has cooked for me). I think if he ever wanted to get out of computers he could have a great culinary career. I can't cook a lick, I can bake though. I think if he ever is able to come to trivia again he should just make breakfast without me trying to help him, I just dry out the eggs. I am really spoiled to his eggs. Well lunch is almost over, later folks!

Happy New Year

2006-01-02T10:34:00.000-08:00

A big old Happy New Year to you. Not sure exactly how it got to be 2006 already, but what are you goign to do? I'm still working on my Christmas letter, so you (if you know me) will be getting that with a sum-up of the year.

Christmas

2005-12-28T09:29:00.000-08:00

Well another Christmas has come and gone already. I have to admit I'm a little sad to see it go. I am feeling a little guilty today after reading a couple friends' blogs about how their Christmas wasn't so great. It makes me even more thankful for having such a great family even if they pick on me a lot.

Marty & I left pretty early Saturday morning, about 10. We ran into nasty fog at about Sparta, which is only 30 min. into the 2+ hour drive. SO things were a little slow going and definately neveracking. I'm not the best driver in bad weather, too tense I'd say. Once we got to the city limits of Stevens Point things were decent. We got home and had some lunch. My brother needed to get his dog some food so we took off to Fleet Farm. I needed a neck pillow for my trip to Hawaii, so I went along. No neck pillow and at first no dog food. The guy went in the back and found 5 bags, Ian got 2. Yipee food for Keenan!!! We stopped at Target to look for a pillow and found one. I parused the Christmas decor and gift wrap section to see if anything was on clearance yet, but it wasn't. We finally used the last of our Christmas wrapping paper that we got on clearance 4 years ago. Then back to the house. The family hung out the rest of the afternoon and I honestly don't remember how we passed that time.

At about 6 it was time for Christmas Eve dinner of creamy potato soup. Yummy! Then we did our traditional drive around town to look at Christmas lights. Ian drove since he has the biggest car by far. Dad was in the front and Mom, Marty and I crammed in the back seat. The seats are leather so Marty thought it would be funny to push me over a bunch of times when I was trying to get buckled up. We saw lots of great lights this year and us three backseat people were feeling silly so we clapped and wooped at all the good ones. We even made a trip down to the Bamberg household to see what they had up and we were quite impressed. Then we headed back home to open presents. I have some how become the offical gift passer outer despite knocking the tree over back in like 1998 and breaking my Dad's Packer ornament. My parents did spot the tree when I went behind it to get the one last gift back there. So once everything was passed out we each took turns opening a gift as we went around the livingroom. Now normally this isn't a super long process, but then again we normally will go in together to get one big gift for my parents, but not this year. So they each had a couple gifts from me, Ian, and Marty. It ended up taking 3 hours to open them all, we even had to have an intermission for potty breaks. My mom always wraps sveral gifts and puts them in a larger box and then wraps that to make it a little more difficult to figure out what we got. This is especially important since we are big on Christmas lists. Ian decided to do a twist on this and wraped my gifts in a box with my Dad's gifts to see if I would think that he hadn't gotten me anything and cry. Well I wasn't fooled for a second, actually I hadn't even noticed yet that there wasn't anything for me from him. PLus like I really would have thought he didn't get me anything. After he told me of his plan I told him that I still have the recites for gifts so I could just return his. He also wrapped packing tape all around boxes for Dad and me. It was annoying, but not as bad as when Erika and Liz did the same thing but with duct tape, now that hurt.

Best gifts I gave were the Sims 2 to my mom (I haven't gotten any questions on how to play it yet surprisingly) and a new short leather jacket to Marty. I told him once he took the tags off he couldn't exchange it and he took those off right away so he must like it. He looks really good in it too, I'm going to have to watch out for all the other ladies now. :) I got a lot of great gifts this year. The most exciting one's were a very nice Packer zip hoodie from my parents, a Grey Eye Glances CD that's been on my list for oh 2 years now from them as well. Ian got me the tenth season of FRIENDS on DVD. I'm excited about that one because I was really upset that they have come out with a special wood boxed set and when I opened the DVD they have an offer to get the box for it for $10 plus $10 shipping, so now I can have that. *Warning Geeky Moment Coming* Marty got me Photoshop CS1 and an upgrade to CS2 plus a 20.5" widescreen LCD monitor that can rotate to portrait mode for my computer. It's super cool and has really great resolution. Once we got all the settings right it gave me a whole bunch more desktop space for working in Photoshop, Illustrator, and Premiere. Plus it makes my Sims world bigger and look way better! Can you tell I'm excited about it? Man, what a geek!!!

Christmas day we got up and had Christmas dinner at about 11. My mom makes the best Christmas dinner ever, such great stuff. Sweet salad and the special mashed potatoes, how can you go wrong? After lunch it was time to pack up and head back to La Crosse. We made a quick stop at the Bamberg's so Patty could take a look at a jacket we're printing Dad's Computers on for her to make sure she liked it. The thing that sucks the most about being all grown up is several of my friends were back in Point for the Holidays but I was there for such a short time that I didn't have time to see them. It would have been nice especially since one of them I haven't seen since April of 2001. I do read their blogs, so at least I can sort of keep up that way, but it's not the same. Gwyn keeps bugging me to have a 4th of July party, so maybe then. So we got home and got my new monitor hooked up and I watched the Packer game. Then we watched Batman Begins which Marty got from my parents for Christmas. It was Really good.

Monday we got up and headed to Dexter, MN to Marty's parents'. We got there early and Marty started working on trying to get them set up with Direct TV. He thought he could use their Dish Network dish and ended up spend about 2 hours trying to get it to work. Finally he had his dad put up our old Direct TV dish and it worked right away. I held my tongue and didn't say a thing about it. We ate another Christmas dinner in the meantime. Then it was time for presents. THey gave me a pair of fleece Packer mittens which are really cute and they gave us each some money to use on our Honeymoon. PLus they always give us lottery tickets to scratch off. I was the big winner this year with $15, Marty got $2. They wanted to switch the TV in the kitchewn and the one in the living room, so Marty and I grabbed the one in the LR and his dad grabbed the one in the K. I ened up pulling a muscle in my my right wrist so I'm dealing with pain in my mouse hand which is not good considering what I do. Marty got all the stuff for Direct TV switched over to his parents. To make a very long story short we ended up without service or recievers we could use to set-up a new account for us. When we got back to La Crosse we went out to Best Buy and were going to get an HD reciever until we found out that in order to get the rebate for it we have to sign up for the HD service which is $10.99 a month. THat would be fine, but we don't have an HD TV yet. He was just going to get that one so we wouldn't have to buy it later. Anyway, so we got a regular cheap one and one that has a built in DVR since we can record two things at the same time with that one and it was free after rebate. We went home and got everything set-up and working excpet the local channels. Luckily Marty had them on the phone and it turns out that you need a second dish for those so we have an appointment for them to come set that up next week. Well then Marty couldn't get the Replay to control the reciever in the livingroom and he called Replay and they said that Direct TV made it so they couldn't in the new models. So he had to call Direct TV again and they got the old reciever to work again so we could use it. It was SO much fun, but I think everything is finally in order. We just have to figure out what we are going to do about internet now because we have that through our cable provider so we have to have local channels through them and the other service we want isn't ready yet. SO do we switch to DSL and get tyed into a year contract or stick with the cable, pay extra and hope that the service we want is available soon?

Drivers

2005-12-22T12:06:00.000-08:00

So we're in the thick of last minute shopping and holy crap are people in a hurry. Now I finished my shopping December 3 so perhaps that's why I don't understand the rush. People are just driving around like they have a woman in labor in the back seat and the baby is crowning. Of course I work across the street from the mall and next to Old Navy, plus I live by Shopko. So my drive home each night requires a lot of praying and more patience than I normally have in traffic. I don't know if people think that the 30 seconds they're going to save by driving like a moron is really going to make that big of a differene when it comes to getting their Holiday gifts. I mean really, is it worth risking your's and my life to get done 2 minutes sooner? It's not my fault you didn't get your shopping done sooner and unfortunately I have to go to work, so I don't have a choice about being there or not. So plan better in the future and slow the ____ down now.

My Husband is Mean

2005-12-21T13:02:00.000-08:00

Well Marty is mean. He always does this to me. He came into my work yesterday and told me my one present arrived and we was going to take some wrapping paper and wrap it at work. He claimed I was putting him in the poor house, which it's not my fault that he buys me expensive gifts. He also told that he bet I wouldn't be able to guess what it is. Yes, that was a challenge. You see I have this thing where I always figure out what he's gotten me before I open it. I don't try, it just happens. He then gets mad at me. So when I got home last night there's this big box in front of the tree because it doesn't fit under it. That combined with the challenge I had recieved earlier in the day, got me thinking. So I have 2 ideas of what it could be. If it's one of them I will be forced to kill him because it's way too much, but that is less likely. I told him last night that he was mean because I wasn't even thinking about it until he said something and now it's driving me crazy. He said he knew and that's why he even said anything. Good thing Christmas is only 3 days away.

On a side note I know he was getting my digital SLR in December and he gave it to me in May for my birthday, based on one small comment. It's not my fault, he just needs to say nothing at all unless me wants me to figure it out.

Hiya

2005-12-20T12:44:00.000-08:00

Sorry to my, umm 6 readers, that I haven't posted in over a week. Things have been busy getting ready for Christmas. I found my Christmas spirit. I put up my tree on the 10th and bang, there it was. That must have just been a particularly bad week. I also finally got my mixed CD made of my favorite Christmas songs. Some of the songs were hard to find a good version on itunes, but I managed pretty well. So no more internet radio that flakes out 20 times a day. I'm also working on my Christmas letter. I have one page done so far, and it's going to be a long one again this year, but it was a big year.
We went to King Kong Saturday night. It was good, a bit long. The special effects were excellent for the most part. If you are afraid of giant bugs like I am, there's about five minutes that you'll have to hide your face. I was actually shaking I was so scared. We had a nice little date night. On of Marty's friends gave us a TGI Friday's giftcard for the wedding so we went to dinner first. Marty loves it there and I usually manage to find something to eat. Anyway, back to work now.

Missing 1 Christmas Spirit

2005-12-09T11:30:00.000-08:00

I'm hoping someone can help me, I seem to have misplaced my Christmas spirit this year. It's very strange for me because I'm normally annoyingly cheerful around Christmas time. I haven't even put my tree up yet and I don't really have the desire to either. I'm going to make myself this weekend and hope it will jump start things. I have all my shopping done, super early for me too, so maybe that's bumming me out, no anxiety about if I can find the perfect gift. I've also had a stressful work week, so perhaps I'm out of sorts as a result. I've been making a list of my favorite Christmas songs and I'm going to do some shopping on itunes to make my perfect Christmas CDs this weekend. Hopefully that will help. I've been listening to interent radio and I can't get into the really good Holiday station, so I'm stuck with O.K. Christmas music, so maybe that's why my Christmas Spirit is missing. Here's hoping I can find it...

An Update on Stuff

2005-12-05T12:21:00.000-08:00

I finally got anti-biotics the day after Thanksgiving and in that regard I am feeling better. They yickied up my stomach, so I spent another weekend on the sofa resting, but there is an end in site. I've been down for a over a month now and I just can't wait to really feel well again.

Thanksgiving was good. We went to Marty's family on Thanksgiving and my family Friday afternoon (after going to a different doctor and the phamacy) and came back early Sunday. It was good to see the family, but I napped a lot.

Marty & I got the first season of LOST on DVD and watched it in about a week then obtained the beginning of this season, watched those and we're all up to date. That show is SO good, I'm SO addicted. I've been listening to some podcasts for it and feeling very stupid, since I missed so much stuff. I even have a theory all my own as to what is going on, but I'm not going to share. MArty thinks it's plosable.

Let's see... I did all my Christmas shopping this weekend. I'm basically done. Are you jealous?

It's gotten cold out, which of course I hate. I did get a couple awesome micro-fleece shirts from Old Navy, which is actually keeping me at a decent temperature, I wish they had better colors, so I could have gotten more.

I just got an email that our Wedding Video is done!!! I'm goign to blurst! It wasn't supposed to be done for another month!!! I can hardly wait to see the finished product.

We booked our Honeymoon to Hawaii this past weekend. We're going January 17-25. The flight back leaves at 10:55 PM and we don't get back until 2 in the afternoon the next day. Have I mentioned how much I don't like flying? Especially since I've starting watching LOST? Oh well, it will be worth it. I'm SO excited, I can hardly stand it! I'll be using the flight there to finish reading my camera manual since there are still a lot of things that I don't understand about it.

I suppose lunch time is over. BYE!

Idiot

2005-11-23T13:50:00.000-08:00

So I finally went to the doctor yesterday for my sinuses. My regular doctor had to leave suddenly Monday for a funeral and was gone yesterday too. I didn't want to wait until today to get in to see her, so I took an appointment with a different doctor. Well I get there and there was all kinds of fun with the new insurance because the company was sold and the new company took over the same day my coverage started, so they don't have a card for me yet, almost 2 monthes later. Anyway, the nurse calls me in and she seemed really pissed to have to deal with me, so that started it off on a high note. Then the doctor came in and was talking to me, asking me about anything I was being treated for and as soon as I said anxiety, his whole demeanor changed. So he looks me over, does the deep breathes thing and very lightly touches the sinus areas on my face. When I say lightly I mean barely touching me at all and asks if that hurt. Well of course that doesn't hurt he was barely touching me. Every other doctor I've been to does the tap on the sinuses test. So he tells me he sees no signs of a sinus infection, tells me to use a nasal spray for three days and come back in if it isn't getting better. I'm VERY frustrated because I waited until the tap test hurt like hell to go in and now this doctor who knows what I could tell him in a minute and a half about my medical history treats me like a hypocondriac.

From Bad to Worse

2005-11-21T14:02:00.000-08:00

So this weekend had good and bad points. The good is Marty and I went to see the new Happy Potter Saturday night. All the shows were sold out at 3PM excpet the 9:30 show, so that's what we got. It was good, a little long to be sitting in the incredibly uncomfortable chairs of the Valley. It would have been fine in the comfy chairs of the Cinema.

Now for the bad... the past two days proved to be terrible for my sinuses. My cold finally turned the corner and changed into a good old sinus infection. Yesterday it felt like someone had punched me in the nose, plus sinuses that I didn't even know existed started to hurt like crazy. So B was right, but I wasn't really surprised by that. Unfortunately the doctors won't give you anti-biotics until it's a full blown infection, so there was nothing to be done last week. I called my doctor's office this morning at 8AM hoping I could get the anti-biotics without having to go in since I've had so many and I know that is what it is, but I haven't heard back. I'm very frustrated because if she says she wants to see me then tomorrow would be the earliest and she is a very popular doctor so that would be doubtful. I JUST WANT TO START FEELING BETTER!!!

And of course I'm stuck here at work because someone can't get me their artwork to me in a timely manor (as in they should have had it here a week ago) Geerrrr...

Still SIck

2005-11-17T13:48:00.000-08:00

Well, it's day 12 of the cold that just won't quit. I don't feel AS bad as I did last week, but I feel far from well. I'm about ready to rip my sinuses out of my head because I'm thinking they will feel better then. Friday I left work about 2 hours early and went home to take a nice 2 hour nap. That was good. All Marty and I did all weekend was sleep and then sleep some more. I slept 12 hours Firday night, several hours during the day on Saturady and then 15 hours Saturday night. Marty is still sick too, just not as bad as me anymore. A new study came out that concluded that the more time a person spends being cold, the more likely they are to catch a cold. So with the Rhynolds Syndrome and Autoimmune problems, I'm about screwed. Maybe when we go on our honeymoon, I just won't come back.

I did have a nice chat with my brother Friday night. Very interesting. Also we went to Home Depot Sunday and got a snow blower. Very exciting! No, seriously, I'm excited about it. I have such a hard time with my asthma and the Rhynolds Sydrome, being outside in the winter time, and constantly being sick so Marty gets stuck doing most of the shoveling. We're hoping since it won't take anywhere near as long with the blower, that I can help more. It usually takes me an hour to an hour and a half to shovel our walk and driveway, so this will definately be faster.

Cold

2005-11-09T14:41:00.000-08:00

So my cold is hanging in there. I have to drink tea continuously to feel decent. My ears are all plugged so I can't hear a dang thing, at least the loud people around aren't as loud today. I would be at home in bed right now if it weren't for the fact that I'm swamped with work right now. I might have to take some home with me this weekend, let's hope not though. I'm on my lunch break right now, in case anyone is wondering why I'm blogging instead of working. I'm picking up some chicken mega noodle soup for dinner tonight. I can hardly wait! It is the best thing about being sick, if there is one good thing.

Where does this come from?

2005-10-25T12:40:00.000-07:00

So I've been thinking again. It seems that a lot of people, especially the people I work with, think that I'm just about perfect. Seriously when someone makes a mistake my boss will say, "Everyone makes mistakes, except Rachel, she's perfect." Of course he isn't being literal, but he has then told me that I'm as close to perfect as anyone he's ever met. It's an interesting perception for someone to have of me. I will admit that I make far fewer mistakes at work than anyone else here, but it has to do with me being organized not my level of perfection. I definately have far more psychological and social ummm... imperfections than most people I know. Do I protray an orha of perfection in order to mask my serious levels of imperfection? Interesting...

Weekend

2005-10-24T14:26:00.000-07:00

Well what to say about the weekend? I slept a lot, we're talking 12 hours a night, which I really needed. Although this dreary weather is really getting to me. I need some sun please! I got about 80 bulbs planted in 8 hours of my 250 to do. I'm going to go to Home Depot and invest in a bulb planter you use standing up verses the one I have now that you have to sit. I think it will go faster. Plus I might be able to break through the old roots in the ground more easily. A critter came around Saturday night and dug up and ate 3 of my carefully planted tulip bulbs. I was none too pleased, so I killed it. Hehe, not really. I replanted bulbs and put the stinky stuff all over the holes. So the yard smells, but no critters will eat my bulbs. What a trade off. I have to try to get as much done this week as possible since it's almost Novemeber and I think we all know what that means... SNOW will be here soon.

I did some picking up in the kitchen, so it's getting there. Miss Dolynn is coming on Friday so I need to get some cleaning done. Not that I think she will care too much if it's a mess, but I really wanted to keep the place clean after the wedding and thus far I am failing. No good at all. Tonight I'll be talkign to my parents, so I don't know how much I will get done, but in theory I can clean the office while tedthered to the computer. I'm very excited for this weekend. Lots of scrapbooking and general merriment and talking. We just have to try to not stay up until 4 AM like we usually do.

Well, here I am again...

2005-10-21T09:46:00.000-07:00

Well, here I am again. Tired as usual. I'm so happy it's Friday and I'm not doing anything this weekend besides sleeping in way late both day. I stayed up too late every night this week. Various distractions kept me from sleep. I don't feel very well today either, but that could just be being really run down and some allergies or a mild cold. The doctor's office ended up calling me and I was able to get both my shots. They had to do one in each arm. They are still swore to the touch from Wednesday, but the pain just sitting here is gone. The best part is I won't need a pneumonia shot for 10 years!

I think I'm going to switch my on line photo processing place. The place I've been going through for about 2 years has just switched to using Fuji paper. I understand them doing that to make it possible to have such low prices, but to sacrifice that much quality just isn't worth it to me. I've never been a fan of Fuji paper and that's why I won't ever get prints made from a certain retailer that uses it. The colors just aren't as rich as they are on Kodak paper. I'm looking at the Kodak gallery. They are linked to Adobe Photoshop album which is not only convinent, but also speaks very highly of them. I'll have to try them out and see what I think. I just wish I hadn't ordered so many from the other place. They look fine, just not great. The black and white are almost sepia tone. Such things don't bother most people, but I spend hours color correcting my images and I want them to look good.

I have failed miseribly at my goals for last week. The cleaning ones that is. I did pick up a little in each room, buT they aren't really clean. My problem with cleaning the office is as soon as I sit down at the computer I get sucked into photo editing. I just need to buckle down and do it. My other project for the weekend is to plant the fall bulbs I got at Cosco last weekend. I just hope it isn't too cold.

Frustration

2005-10-19T12:42:00.000-07:00

I made an appointment about a mounth ago to get my depot shot and a pneumonia shot and I was supposed to see if I qualify as high risk for an early flu shot. The receptionsist told me the nurse would be able to determine that. I went in this morning and the nurse gave me the depo and was going to send me on my way. So I told her about the other two shots. She went off to get the stuff. She came back awhile later and said there wasn't anything in my chart saying I should get a pneumonia shot and since my doctor wasn't in today she couldn't find out if she even could give it to me. She asked why I was getting one and I told her that I had pneumonia last year to which she said, "Oh." She also said my chart says I have "mild asthma" and asked if I take something everyday and I told her about the steriod inhaler. So basically, my chart hasn't been updated to say that I now have severe asthma and the idiot receptionist should have had checked with a nurse or a doctor. So now I have to wait until my doctor is in again and the nurse has a chance to talk to her, then scedule an unnecessary appointment, which I will have to pay for and hope I don't get sick in the meantime, which considering my immunine system, is very possible. Then I'll be sick for 6 weeks minimum and hope I can squeeze it in before I get sick again. I mean seriously, if I don't qualify as high risk, who does? I get sick easier and more often than anyone I know including people who are in the high risk category. Anyway, enough venting...

Proofs!

2005-10-17T14:16:00.000-07:00

I got my wedding proofs Friday night! I must say they are great! I'm thuroly (wow I can't spell) impressed. My only complaint is that there weren't more. 256 would be enough for a normal person, but this is me we're talking about. So my grand total until I get somemore from the people that had film cameras is 1750. I could practically make a flip book here people. I had a happy surprise too. She doesn't print the proofs anymore (she had a second child and just doesn't have the time) and the place that does the printing accidentally made doubles. Yippee for happy accidents!!! They did make one other mistake however that I'm not please about. My photographer asked me if I'd like to have them scan the negatives for about $100 for all of them. I decided to go for it. Her services were comparitively cheap and it would save me a lot of time and I would have them on the computer right away. Since the negatives are mine to keep, why not. I popped the CD in my computer when I got home and looked through them. I noticed there were some from the album that weren't on there so I counted how many there should be, 256, but the disk had 129. So I have an email into my photographer to have her get them to fix it stat. I'm sure she will, it just put a little tarnish on an otherwise spectacular day and experience. Now we have to figure out what 10-15 we want black and white prints of and what 5 8"x10" we want that came with the package. Decisions, decisions...

On another note, today is one year to the day that I caught pneumonia. I remember because it's the day after my dad's birthday. Well guess what, I have the beginnings of a cold. Everyone around me is sick so it's not surprising. I have to try to stay well until Wednesday because I'm supposed to get my flu and pneumonia shots and they won't give them to me if I'm sick. It's frustraing because they wouldn't give them to me any earlier and I get sick SO easily. The thing that was frustraing last year is I kept getting sick over and over again, so I was never able to get a flu shot, which actually helps keep me from getting as many colds as well. If I can't get one this year and the same thing happens I just don't know what I am going to do. I'm taking Echinacea like crazy, so keep your fingers crossed for me.

Pictures!!!!!!!!!!!!

2005-10-13T18:46:00.000-07:00

I just got my photo order from dotphoto.com of 1023 wedding photos and I get my professional prooofs tomorrow! I'm So happy I could Burst right now! I figure it's going to take me until our tenth anniversary to scrapbook all these pictures.

Also we got a new printer, an Epson stylus Photo R200 and it is AWESOME! It even prints direstly on CDs! So I'm a picture machine right now! *Singing little happy song, and doing a happy dance*

Weekend

2005-10-10T14:23:00.000-07:00

Well let's see how I did this weekend.

Week Goals Update and Weekend Goals
1. Place photo order with Dotphoto, so I can have something to scrapbook with
100% Done. 1023 picked and ordered

2. Burn disks of wedding pictures for people and mail them out.
100% done, Kimmie and Melissa got their's already. Poor Gwyn has to wait another day.

3. Heal my ankle so they'll stop calling me grandma at work
Major set back. Too much walking this weekend, back on the cane.

5. Finally put my laundry away, but that involves the stairs so my ankle has to heal first.
100% complete

NEW WEEKEND GOALS
Now realize that I seem to think that weekends are about 5 days long, so I'll probably have way more on here than it's humanly possible to get done in two days.

1. Finish any of the above that are within my control
100% done

2. Do Laundry (makes #5 above even more necessary)
100% done and it's put away!!!

3. Buy Dad's birthday present
100% done

4. Buy Ian's birthday present
100% done

5. Clean Kitchen
Didn't start

6. Clean Office
50% done

7. Update Sims 2 Challenges for Night Life
100% done

8. Do something fun with Marty. Movie?
100% done

9. Finish Burning DVDs for Kevin
100% done

10. Pull pens for Herb to take back to work Monday
Not started

11. Frame Wedding photo in signed mat.
100% done

12. Finish Uploading Wedding Photos to my Mom's Dotphoto for her
100% done

13. Actually play the Sims 2 some. I've played three times this past month, which is seriously low for me.
100% done only played a little over an hour, but that's O.K.

14. Watch the Packer game and try not to swear too much.
100% done. Didn't Swear At All!!! GO PACK!!!

15. Scrapbook 1 page Minium
100% done

So Pretty Successful I'd say, except the cleaning. Let's face it though this is me, if you're surprised those are the things that didn't get done, then you don't know me. SO I'll carry those things I didn't get done to be my goals for this week.

Dotphoto Has Redeemed Itself...

2005-10-07T17:07:00.000-07:00

or at least made me happier than I was. I talked to a woman on the phone today and she has no idea why my cart emptied and she can't get it back. They are going to pay for my shipping on this order once I actually get it placed for the inconvince. Shipping is $15.99 for 500+ prints so at least it's something. I'm happier than I was before I talked to them. She also told me I was smart for coming up with the idea of copying what I want into it's own album. So that's nice too.

I just got a photo CD from Gwyn in the mail too. Which I'm very excited about!

Week Goals Update and Weekend Goals

2005-10-07T01:18:00.000-07:00

1. Place photo order with Dotphoto, so I can have something to scrapbook with
80% Done. 800+ are picked, I should be able to finish this up tonight

2. Burn disks of wedding pictures for people and mail them out.
95% done, Just have to mail them after work today.

3. Heal my ankle so they'll stop calling me grandma at work
80% done. No longer hurts, but the tenden is really pissed off and I'm still limping

5. Finally put my laundry away, but that involves the stairs so my ankle has to heal first.
50% complete, I've now worn about half of the cloths I had to put away, so that counts, right?

NEW WEEKEND GOALS
Now realize that I seem to think that weekends are about 5 days long, so I'll probably have way more on here than it's humanly possible to get done in two days.

1. Finish any of the above that are within my control

2. Do Laundry (makes #5 above even more necessary)

3. Buy Dad's birthday present

4. Buy Ian's birthday present

5. Clean Kitchen

6. Clean Office

7. Update Sims 2 Challenges for Night Life

8. Do something fun with Marty. Movie?

9. Finish Burning DVDs for Kevin

10. Pull pens for Herb to take back to work Monday

11. Frame Wedding photo in signed mat.

12. Finish Uploading Wedding Photos to my Mom's Dotphoto for her

13. Actually play the Sims 2 some. I've played three times this past month, which is seriously low for me.

14. Watch the Packer game and try not to swear too much.

15. Scrapbook 1 page Minium

That should be more than enough to keep me busy the next two days.

Goals Update

2005-10-06T14:50:00.000-07:00

1. Place photo order with Dotphoto, so I can have something to scrapbook with
Started over, AGAIN!!! 10% done this time. See previous post.

2. Burn disks of wedding pictures for people and mail them out.
80% done, One Disk to burn

3. Heal my ankle so they'll stop calling me grandma at work
80% done. No longer hurts, but the tenden is really pissed off and I'm still limping

5. Finally put my laundry away, but that involves the stairs so my ankle has to heal first.
0% complete, Been too busy trying to order pictures :(

6. Finish editing the remainder of my bridal shower and couples shower pictures.
100% done.

7. Upload above pictures.
100% done.

I think I'm going to be physically ill

2005-10-06T10:41:00.000-07:00

I'm very upset today, so much so that I'm on the vurge or either crying or becoming physically ill. I spent all my lunches last week and several evenings going through my dotphoto account and picking out the prints I wanted from my wedding and PAtty's renewal. This is how I always place large orders, put a few in the cart at a time, then I log back in later and pick more. Well I had about 550 in their Tuesday, then I added somemore and when I went to the cart again and only the ones I had just put in were there.

Now if you know me at all, you know how much I hate having to do things twice. I sent an email into support, but based on the amount of time it took to get a response last time, I decided to redo my order Tuesday night. It took 6 hours and I had over 900 photos in the cart. I knew there were a few more that I wanted to add the next day that weren't uploaded yet, so I saved my cart and left. Last night I went in and added some more checking after each time album to make sure they were still there. The very last batch I put in which would have brought my grand total to about 1,000, I go to the cart and only those last ones were in there. I couldn't believe it. Once is a fluke, but why would it happen twice and all of a sudden?!?! SO I emailed support again. I had been contacted by someone during the day who gave me general information that I already knew and I had told her thanks, but I ended up redoing it. Now, I told her it had happened again in the hopes she could restore my cart. I got up this morning and she had emailed me. She has no idea why this would happen and she can't get the cart back the way it was. I was so upset, I've now spent upwards of 10 hours trying to order my prints and I'm going to have to do it again!

After much thought I think I figured out why it happened. Both times it happened when I added photos to the cart that had uploaded during the session I was in. If that makes sense. So for some reason that is resetting my cart. It shouldn't happen, but it's the only thing that makes sense to me. I'm waiting for the dotphoto lady to call me so I can tell her this is has happened so they can fix it. What I'm going to do for now is create a new album and then copy the printer I want into it and when I'm done select the whole ablum to order.

Some People

2005-10-05T14:24:00.000-07:00

I'm frustrated right now. People with the attitude of when I say jump, you say how high? drive me crazy. This is our busiest time of year at work. Our printers are 3 days behind on their printing now and wokred 6 days last week. Seriously three days because of people like this. People that can't plan far enough in advance to order their Oktoberfest shirts early and then have the gall to be upset about a $50 rush charge. I mean how long have they known Oktoberfest was coming up, a year? And then the people that had their orders in on time don't get them because they aren't priority. And the people that call two days after placing their order because they haven't gotten their artwork yet. Like I was sitting around waiting for their order to come in. I have 30 orders to do right now and chances are 25 of them are in front of their's. Relax people, you'll get your artwork! Don't they realize everytime they call me, they're just slowing me down? And the people that come in and have no idea what they want. THey say, "Make it cool." Well gee that helps, could you please be a little more vague? I almost have an idea of what you want. Then they don't like what you do and bring in an idea, thanks for wasting my time! My favorite are the people that give you what they want, you email it to them, then they feel the need to stop in to see you without an appointment. So you're the middle of doing another order and they just show up and expect you to drop everything for them so you can slightly change the design. Then, "Oh can you email that to ______?" "Oh and there are a couple other people that are going to stop in sometime to look at this." Excuse me! You have a print out of it, but it's too inconvient for you to show it to them. Then they get upset when they are charged for all the extra time. They get .5 hours free and everytime they "stop by" they spend at least that with you and when it's 3, 4, 5 times, what do they expect?
So my points:
1. Get your stuff together, know what you want and get it in early
2. You aren't our only customer, so get it in early and relax a little

Sorry, it's been a bad day.

Weekly Goals

2005-10-04T10:39:00.000-07:00

I really liked the weekly goals idea that was on a friend's LJ yesterday. Here are mine and how they have progressed so far.

As for goals... I won't bother with work goals, I have too many to mention, but I always achieve them, so I won't bore you. Personal...
1. Place photo order with Dotphoto, so I can have something to scrapbook with
On hold at the moment. I had about 600 in my cart and then they all suddenly gone! I have an email into the help section.
2. Burn disks of wedding pictures for people and mail them out.
15% done, first disk is burned for everyone.
3. Heal my ankle so they'll stop calling me grandma at work
25% done. Healing coming along nicely, but it is very stiff and won't easily bend correctly at the moment
4. Think good thoughts for my Packers tonight and hope they'll actually win.
100% complete. Did it, didn't work.
5. Finally put my laundry away, but that involves the stairs so my ankle has to heal first.
0% complete, see #4
6. Finish editing the remainder of my bridal shower and couples shower pictures.
50% done. Bridal Shower photos done.
7. Upload above pictures.
50% done. Bridal Shower photos uploaded.

Most my goals are long term, so we'll stick with these for this week.

A Nice Weekend

2005-10-03T14:40:00.000-07:00

So I had a nice weekend. Marty and I spent our first weekend together since we've been married (which is a month today). I'm glad this isn't the way it normally goes, I love spending time just with him, not having to drive anywhere or having any visitors, not that I mind such things upon occasion, but it's been so long...several monthes in fact. So there was lots of relaxing and snuggling, one of my favorites. We watched 4 movies; Elektra, Alexander, The DiVanci Code Decoded (documentary) and The Aviator. The last two were good and I really like The Aviator. I learned a lot. I never knew much about Howard Hughes, except the strange stuff from the end of his life. So sad. I'm so happy there are great drugs to help with OCD now days.

I've also become very interested in the Jung Personality type test that is a couple posts back. It's very interesting how answering 72 questions can so accurately describe a person's personality. Being my personality type I think I should make a hand out to give to people when I first meet them so they have some kind of chance of understanding me, without having to spend 10 years trying to figure out my complex personality. I was not surprised to see how closely Marty and Gwyn's personality percents matched. I've always said they were very similar, that's why they get along so well. I am the most introverted memeber of my family. Shocking actually. My brother is tied with my dad at 44% and my mom is a close second at 68% and I'm 78%. 78, that's crazy, I never would have thought that, but as the description says, I have a rich inner life, maybe that's why I don't notice the lack of interactions with others, or maybe it's that I'm content to interact with a handful of people rather than lots. I've never cared about being popular, I'd rather have a few really good friends than a ton of moderately close relationships. Anyway, lunch time is done, back to work.

HUMANMETRICS Jung Typology Test

2005-09-27T18:00:00.000-07:00

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp

Your Type is
INFJ
Introverted Intuitive Feeling Judging
Strength of the preferences %
78 38 75 78

Qualitative analysis of your type formula

You are:

* very expressed introvert
* moderately expressed intuitive personality
* distinctively expressed feeling personality
* very expressed judging personality

The Portrait of the Counselor Idealist (iNFj)
Copyrighted © 1996-2004 Prometheus Nemesis Book Company
The Counselor Idealists are abstract in thought and speech, cooperative in reaching their goals, and directive and introverted in their interpersonal roles. Counselors focus on human potentials, think in terms of ethical values, and come easily to decisions. The small number of this type (little more than 2 percent) is regrettable, since Counselors have an unusually strong desire to contribute to the welfare of others and genuinely enjoy helping their companions. Although Counsleors tend to be private, sensitive people, and are not generally visible leaders, they nevertheless work quite intensely with those close to them, quietly exerting their influence behind the scenes with their families, friends, and colleagues. This type has great depth of personality; they are themselves complicated, and can understand and deal with complex issues and people.

Counselors can be hard to get to know. They have an unusually rich inner life, but they are reserved and tend not to share their reactions except with those they trust. With their loved ones, certainly, Counselors are not reluctant to express their feelings, their face lighting up with the positive emotions, but darkening like a thunderhead with the negative. Indeed, because of their strong ability to take into themselves the feelings of others, Counselors can be hurt rather easily by those around them, which, perhaps, is one reason why they tend to be private people, mutely withdrawing from human contact. At the same time, friends who have known a Counselor for years may find sides emerging which come as a surprise. Not that they are inconsistent; Counselors value their integrity a great deal, but they have intricately woven, mysterious personalities which sometimes puzzle even them.

Counselors have strong empathic abilities and can become aware of another's emotions or intentions -- good or evil -- even before that person is conscious of them. This "mind-reading" can take the form of feeling the hidden distress or illnesses of others to an extent which is difficult for other types to comprehend. Even Counselors can seldom tell how they came to penetrate others' feelings so keenly. Furthermore, the Counselor is most likely of all the types to demonstrate an ability to understand psychic phenomena and to have visions of human events, past, present, or future. What is known as ESP may well be exceptional intuitive ability-in both its forms, projection and introjection. Such supernormal intuition is found frequently in the Counselor, and can extend to people, things, and often events, taking the form of visions, episodes of foreknowledge, premonitions, auditory and visual images of things to come, as well as uncanny communications with certain individuals at a distance.

[Jane Goodall][Sidney Poitier[Emily Bronte][Carl Jung][Mary Baker Eddy] [Queen Noor]

Mohandas Gandhi and Eleanor Roosevelt are examples of the Counselor Idealist (INFJ).

Famous INFJs:

Nathan, prophet of Israel
Aristophanes
Chaucer
Goethe
Robert Burns, Scottish poet

U.S. Presidents:
Martin Van Buren
James Earl "Jimmy" Carter

Nathaniel Hawthorne
Fanny Crosby, (blind) hymnist
Mother Teresa of Calcutta
Fred McMurray (My Three Sons)
Shirley Temple Black, child actor, ambassador
Martin Luther King, Jr., civil rights leader, martyr
James Reston, newspaper reporter
Shirley McClain (Sweet Charity, ...)
Piers Anthony, author ("Xanth" series)
Michael Landon (Little House on the Prairie)
Tom Selleck
John Katz, critic, author
Paul Stookey (Peter, Paul and Mary)
U. S. Senator Carol Moseley-Braun (D-IL)
Billy Crystal
Garry Trudeau (Doonesbury)
Nelson Mandela
Mel Gibson
Carrie Fisher
Nicole Kidman
Jamie Foxx
Sela Ward
Mark Harmon
Gary Dourdan
Marg Helgaberger
Evangeline Lilly
Tori May

Introverted iNtuiting Feeling Judging
by Marina Margaret Heiss

INFJs are distinguished by both their complexity of character and the unusual range and depth of their talents. Strongly humanitarian in outlook, INFJs tend to be idealists, and because of their J preference for closure and completion, they are generally "doers" as well as dreamers. This rare combination of vision and practicality often results in INFJs taking a disproportionate amount of responsibility in the various causes to which so many of them seem to be drawn.

INFJs are deeply concerned about their relations with individuals as well as the state of humanity at large. They are, in fact, sometimes mistaken for extroverts because they appear so outgoing and are so genuinely interested in people -- a product of the Feeling function they most readily show to the world. On the contrary, INFJs are true introverts, who can only be emotionally intimate and fulfilled with a chosen few from among their long-term friends, family, or obvious "soul mates." While instinctively courting the personal and organizational demands continually made upon them by others, at intervals INFJs will suddenly withdraw into themselves, sometimes shutting out even their intimates. This apparent paradox is a necessary escape valve for them, providing both time to rebuild their depleted resources and a filter to prevent the emotional overload to which they are so susceptible as inherent "givers." As a pattern of behavior, it is perhaps the most confusing aspect of the enigmatic INFJ character to outsiders, and hence the most often misunderstood -- particularly by those who have little experience with this rare type.

Due in part to the unique perspective produced by this alternation between detachment and involvement in the lives of the people around them, INFJs may well have the clearest insights of all the types into the motivations of others, for good and for evil. The most important contributing factor to this uncanny gift, however, are the empathic abilities often found in Fs, which seem to be especially heightened in the INFJ type (possibly by the dominance of the introverted N function).

This empathy can serve as a classic example of the two-edged nature of certain INFJ talents, as it can be strong enough to cause discomfort or pain in negative or stressful situations. More explicit inner conflicts are also not uncommon in INFJs; it is possible to speculate that the causes for some of these may lie in the specific combinations of preferences which define this complex type. For instance, there can sometimes be a "tug-of-war" between NF vision and idealism and the J practicality that urges compromise for the sake of achieving the highest priority goals. And the I and J combination, while perhaps enhancing self-awareness, may make it difficult for INFJs to articulate their deepest and most convoluted feelings.

Usually self-expression comes more easily to INFJs on paper, as they tend to have strong writing skills. Since in addition they often possess a strong personal charisma, INFJs are generally well-suited to the "inspirational" professions such as teaching (especially in higher education) and religious leadership. Psychology and counseling are other obvious choices, but overall, INFJs can be exceptionally difficult to pigeonhole by their career paths. Perhaps the best example of this occurs in the technical fields. Many INFJs perceive themselves at a disadvantage when dealing with the mystique and formality of "hard logic", and in academic terms this may cause a tendency to gravitate towards the liberal arts rather than the sciences. However, the significant minority of INFJs who do pursue studies and careers in the latter areas tend to be as successful as their T counterparts, as it is *iNtuition* -- the dominant function for the INFJ type -- which governs the ability to understand abstract theory and implement it creatively.

In their own way, INFJs are just as much "systems builders" as are INTJs; the difference lies in that most INFJ "systems" are founded on human beings and human values, rather than information and technology. Their systems may for these reasons be conceptually "blurrier" than analogous NT ones, harder to measure in strict numerical terms, and easier to take for granted -- yet it is these same underlying reasons which make the resulting contributions to society so vital and profound.
Copyright © 1996-2005 by Marina Margaret Heiss and Joe Butt

The Wedding Part 1

2005-09-27T12:09:00.000-07:00

Yes, I am finally going to blog about the wedding.

Thurday, September 1, 2005
Running Everywhere Day
Thursday was the day of shopping and running everywhere. After finally figuring out why I couldn't get the DVD to burn, we were off. I don't even remember everywhere we went. I know we went to the grocery store and got all kinds of food for the rehearsal dinner and Sunday brunch. Next we went to Sam's club and picked up the flowers for the center pieces and the rest of the food we needed. The car was full so it was time to go home and drop stuff off. We got some glads and they were so tall we had to stick them out the window and they almost flew away going down the road, so I had to drive a little slow. I pissed some people off, but I didn't care. Then off to Perkins for some lunch/dinner since it was already almost 4. We stopped by Marty's work so he could change his voice mail message to say he was going to be gone. Next to the Wedding Tree to get Marty's tux and my dress. His shoes were a size too big so they got them ordered in for Friday. Finally home, to try to finish up all the little stuff.

Friday, September 2, 2005
The day of insanity!
Friday started out really well. I got up and finished off the few things I didn't get done the night before. Then Marty comes down and says that Heath wanted to come by to zap the remote for a customer so he could get paid. Marty was worried it wasn't going to work so he said he would go with him. This was at 10:30 and Paul was suppossed to be there at noon to set up the tents and needed Marty to help. I was not pleased, but I said as long as he was back by noon, it was fine. My parents and Gwyn got to the house at 11:30 and I promptly put them to work cleaning off the lawn chairs. Time passed quickly and next time I know it was 12:15 and Paul wasn't there yet. I called work and they had no idea where he was, which was no good. Then I got a phone call from my personal attendant, Sonja. Her job had messed up the schedule and put her on to work that night so she couldn't come to rehearsal. I got pretty upset because I was going to have her run the CD player for the ceremony music and I really wanted her partice it. She said she would see if she could sneak out for an hour or so, btu she would let me know. I no sooner get off the phone when it rings again. It was Marty letting me know he was on his way back. At this point it was already 12:30. While I was talking to him the call waiting beeped in, it was Paul, calling to say he wasn't going to be there until 2. Aargh! Marty walked in the door 10 minutes later just in time for Erika (she came sometime during this whole mess), Gwyn and I to go to our nail appointments.

I was frazulled, but the manicure actually helped me calm down. The lady was a lot of fun and really nice. In the middle of Erika's manicure Heather (grooms woman) called to say her and her husband had gotten a flat tire on the way from over by Milwaukee. They had known something was wrong and had already turned around but they were still going to be late. I was a little upset, but everyone was okay and they were back on the road so there was no point getting upset.

We got back to the house and found out that Marc (groomsman) had been rear ended. He too was fine and was in town by this point and getting his tux. Next thing I know Heath, another groomsman, calls to say his van wouldn't start and he still had to pick up his kids from school, which wasn't such a big deal because he was local. At this point we just had to laugh. What are the chances that this many people in the wedding would have car problems.

So we got ourselves all pretty for the rehearsal. I had asked Gwyn to remind me to marinade the chicken before we left, but we forgot until we were particually walking out the door. At which point I looked and her and exclaimed, "CHICKEN!". I did that in record time and we were off. We got out to Fox Hollow almost exactly at 5:00 and there were already people waiting for us. It took a little bit to figure out exactly where everything was going to be and to talk to Eric, the officiant, and the videographers. By the time we were ready Heather and her Eric had made it there. We had called Liz and she had gotten a late start with the new baby and all. Not a big deal, my Aunt was her stand in for the first run through. Our first run through was kind of confusing because no one really knew what was going on, including me to a certain extent, but people asked me questions and I figured it out as we went along. Just as we were getting ready to do the second run through, Liz and Jamie made it there. So we gave her a quick update and we were off. The second run through went great excpet random people came out to the patio to smoke including people who felt the need to push us out of the way with the doors and talk loudly throught the rehearsal. I was upset about that because we had premission to use the space and I can't beleive people would actually be that rude just so they could smoke. If I had known there was going to be a problem I would have made sign to use. Oh well. Our videographers mentioned that the audiance couldn't hear us during the ceremony, so they gave us a good deal on an amplification system for the next day.

We went back to our house for dinner. Marty fired up the grill and my mom and I got the other food around. Unfortunately it took longer to cook everything than we were expecting, but everyone was feed by the time it was done. I realized I should have handed out the gifts earlier since by the time I did it was dark out, but everyone really liked them. The guys were really happy with the poker set and Nicole and Emily loved their teddy bears.

It got to be time to go decorate and after some stutual hints, of blowing out the tiki torches and loading cars to the brim, everyone was ready to go. When we got back to Fox Hollow we found out that no one else had rented the other half of the hall so we got the whole thing! I was quite happy since we would have been crowded on the small side. We unloaded while they got all the tables arranged for us. There were probably about 15 of the wedding people left at this point and everyone asked what they should do and were promptly put to work. I had everything organized and knew how it was all supposed to look. A little explaination and demonstration and they did a better job than I did. Three times throught the whole thing 3 people came up and all said, "Rachel" at the same time. That was a little hecktic, but everyone was very patient. We got everything set up in a bout 1.5 hours and people had fun doing it, which is pretty amazing, to have fun working. I went pretty simple with decorations. THe hall already had some and less is definately more in these cases. The last thing I wanted was a tacky wedding.

Then everyone went to get a good night's sleep. It was a little late 10:45, but not too bad.

That's the end of part one, I'll try to do part 2 soon.

Alcohol hurt me even though I didn't drink it!

2005-09-26T01:33:00.000-07:00

So Saturday night I was dancing at Patty's wedding. "I Will Survive" was playing and I was doing my normal rutuin. The dance floor was wood and kind of textured. Normally I would have been dancing without my shoes on, but with the strange floor and the large amount of alcohol spilled on the floor I had my shoes on. I had stepped in a puddle of booz without realizing it. I went to do the normal back bend for "Lay Down and Die" and my left leg flew out from under me. My arms shot outward to catch myself. My right hand started to grab the neckline of Gwyn's dress, but I realized that was what it was and I let go so I wouldn't tear her dress off. The finger tips on my left hand brushed against my brother's sleeve, just enough to get his attention, but not in time for him to catch me. So, I fell and my left ankle hit the heel of my right shoe and I landed on top of it. I did have enough presence of mind to not hit my head on the floor, so that was good. I didn't realize how badly I had hurt myself at the time. I thought I was just going to have a nasty burse from hitting the ankle on the shoe. I limped around a little the rest of the night. Yesterday morning I woke up and it was crazy swollen. I iced it before I came home. Last night I watched it swell to the point where I had half a golf ball protruding just below the joint. I limped into work this morning where the whole foot swelled so much that my foot was going numb from lack of blood supply. I went over to SHopko and got a quick ice pack thing and one to put in the freezer. The quick one helped a little and I'm still waiting for the regular one to get cooler. I really don't want to go to the doctor because I'm sure it's just a sprain, but man it hurts.

Tired and Lonely

2005-09-19T14:01:00.000-07:00

I'm tired. Went ot the renaissance festivla in the twin cities this weekend because Gwyn really wanted to. My brother, Keenan, she and I all went. It was fun. The reason I'm tired is about 10 minutes after she left to go back to point yesterday I get a call that she blew a tire. So, out to help her, her parents were trying to tell her to drive home on the spare and I told her she wasn't allowed because the sun was just going down as we finished. So 3 hours after I went out to help her, we got back the house after trying to find a place that was open to fix it with no luck. So at 9 Pm I ate dinner and we started watching the Packer game. We got to bed at like midnight. Then up this morning at 6 so we could get her into WalMart before I had to be to work. She got on the road at about 9:30 and thus far things are going well.

Marty had to leave again for work. He got back last Sunday at 11:20 PM and had to leave yesterday at 2. He comes back tomorrow night at 8. Then I am gone starting Friday night for Patty's wedding and he couldn't leave work early to come so I won't see him until Sunday afternoon again. So when people ask me how married life is I say, "I don't know, I haven't seen my husband." I think this is the last time he has to leave for a while. I hope so at least.

something more important

2005-09-13T13:54:00.000-07:00

Well if you thought this was going to be about my wedding, be patient it is coming. But for now I have to talk about something more important. Hurricane Katrina hit one week before my wedding and because I was so engrossed in the final details the graviety of the situtation didn't even begin to sink in until I was watching CNN footage online Sunday (Sept. 4) night. I knew it was bad from the little I had seen or heard, but I had no idea how bad. Maybe I sheltered myself from the information because I am very empathetic. I was devistated after 9/11 and I didn't want to feel the same for the wedding. Now the sarrow sits firmly in my gut. 9/11 has been my day to give thanks for eveything I have for four years now, but Katrina has made me even more grateful. There is nothing in my life to complain about that even remotely compairs to what people have lost. I'm tired, but I'm alive and my loved ones are well. My house is mess again (working on it), but at least I have a house to go to home to at night, it hasn't been torn appart or flooded. I'm not enjoying being back at work after being off for so long, but least I have a way of making money. Everything at the wedding didn't go completely prefectly, but at least I got to have my wedding unlike countless others in the states effected. It was supposed to be the happiest day of their lives, but instead they lost everything they had and some lost more than things. And it's not like this is something that will be fixed in a week or two. Somethings can't be fixed or brought back and others will take countless months or possibly years to bring back anything even remotely resembling their former glory. I went New Orleans once and I remember how unique the city was. It was hard to believe that a city that different than any other place I've ever been existed in this country. Marty wanted to go there, possible for our honeymoon in January. We will find a different time to go now. It will be a very different city than the one I remember by then although more similar than it is now. The whole thing, all the devistation, just breaks my heart.

Clean House

2005-08-30T13:48:00.000-07:00

My mom was here again this weekend and she helped us clean the whole house. I got rid of so much stuff it isn't even funny. I just finished up yesterday. Now we have to keep it nice.

I can't believe the wedding is Saturday!!! I have to finish up the video yet. I was going to do that yesterday, but Marty had the server down so I couldn't do it. I was none too happy, now I have extra pressure. I'm finishing up my lunch then I have like 2 things to do and then I can leave andgo work on it.

Skills Learned

2005-08-25T12:41:00.000-07:00

Skills Learned from Planning the Wedding and Finishing Up the House Remodeling for Wedding

1. Rubber Stamping
2. Embossing
3. How to use vellum
4. Drawing up what you want to etch into glass on the computer and then printing full sheet labels makes it a lot easier
5. How to make gel candles
6. Flower arrangements should have 3 main colors
7. Scrapbooking
8. How to lay ceramic tile
9. How to make tab curtains
10. Gout is a great conductor of electricity (not a skill, but an important lesson)
11. How to make and stick to a budget
12. Throw crap away
13. Cleaning the inside of the refrigerator isn't that hard.
14. It's better to start out organized than to try and get organized later.
15. How to hand bead shoes
16. How to make a custom menu for my DVDs
17. How to make a video slide show in Premiere
18. How to make a photo mosaic

I'm sure there are more too

Top 10 Things I've Learned

2005-08-24T19:00:00.000-07:00

Top 10 Things I've Learned From Planning My Wedding

10. How to sensor yourself when you get a gift you didn't want
9. Never try to address invitations when you're tired, your boss Paul becomes Paula.
8. Guys really do care about some of this stuff and will help if you ask them.
7. Book stuff early!
6. Listen to the advice of those who have planned weddings before you, they know what they are talking about.
5. You can forego playing the Sims 2 for awhile in order to get stuff done.
4. Making a very personal wedding will drive you crazy and just about kill ya.
3. Proof read, Proof read, Proof read the programs before printing and assembling them 125 of them
2. If someone is willing to help you with a project, never critize the job they do, at least you don't have to do it all yourself.
1. Everything doesn't have to be prefect!!!

I don't know what to do

2005-08-23T21:35:00.000-07:00

I'm kind of at a loss at the moment as to what to do. there are still 10 people (5 couples) that haven't RSVPed to the wedding, well actually more never did, but I was able to guess on everyone else, you know they live half way across the country and what not. I need to get my final head count into the caterer and baker. I wanted to have them in tomorrow, but how many do I put down? My number right now is 109, so do I do 119 and then hope they actually come since I have to pay for them anyway or say 109 and hope they don't come or that someone that said they were going to doesn't? Or do I split the difference and say 114? The problem is all these people live close enough that they could possibly just show up unannounced. Marty is going to call one of them tomorrow and hopefully get an anwser, that would alleve one set of question marks? I'm leaning towards splitting the difference since the caterer will have some extra food to accommodate people with a larger appetite. I just don't want anyone going hungery, but on the other hand I don't want to through money away when we are on a relatively tight budget. Anyone that says they are going to elope and just have a reception really doesn't realize that 95% of the headaches come from the reception. The ceremony was pretty easy, pick what you want, get something to wear and a few accessories and you're good to go. I don't know it's all just crazy right now. Advice someone, PLEASE!!!

Fun

2005-08-23T13:32:00.000-07:00

Well I never got around to talking about my "fun" Friday evening. Friday was a rough day because so many people still hadn't RSVPed on the last day. I was on the verge of a panic attack all day so I decided when I got home it would be a good time to try out the Vallium. My doctor said I could take 5-10 mg if I wanted. Being someone who caffiene is the strongst drug I use, I decided to try 2.5 mg to see how it worked. About an hour after I took it, not only had all my anxiety melted away, but I felt well, the way to describe it is high. Now I have no frame of reference for what that feels like, but I would imagine that would be how it would. I liked the lack of anxiety, but I'm not one to want to feel out of it. I was very all over the place too. I would start one thing and two seconds later be starting something else. My mom told me I seemed drunk. That is not how I want to be on the day of the wedding. I am going to try 1.25 mg between now and the wedding to see how that affects me. If it's the same I'm going to forego anything unless I'm hyper ventilating. Feeling like that is just out of the question. It seemed to slow down my brain, which is good, it was just too much. My doc said I could up the Paxil one more time, so I am going to try that instead, since that normalizes me verses stoning me

Oh You Have Got to be Kidding Me!!!

2005-08-22T11:45:00.000-07:00

so I was looking at the programs last night to make sure I spelled everyone's name right on the place cards and realized i made a huge error. I put Marty's cousin down as Ben Lecy and he's Ben Fink! So now this is a pretty big error and really needs to be fixed. I think I'm going to scream!!!

Sadness

2005-08-22T07:12:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling very sad today. We got some bad news last night. Our dear sweet neighbor, Jenny, passed away on Friday. She was in her eighties and had a heart condition along with other health problem, but she was always very chipper. She lived in the house behind us and would always come out when I was working in my garden to tell me how beautiful my flowers were and we would talk. She had been down in Indianapolis visiting one of her childern for a couple months. She was on her way back up and her heart gave out at a rest stop. They tried to chopper her into Gundersen Lutheran hostipal, but there was nothing that could have been done. The really sad part for me is she was coming back early so she could come to our wedding. She had asked her son that lives down the street if he would take her, and he was going to. She will be greatly missed.

RSVP Frustration

2005-08-19T12:48:00.000-07:00

Well today is the last day for people to RSVP for the wedding and there are still some 67 people who haven't done so yet (If you told me in an email that are or aren't coming, I have marked you down). I'm hoping to get a lot of emails today from the knot saying people have RSVPed or that there will be many messages on the answering machine when I get home. Marty thinks if people don't RSVP we should just figure they aren't coming, but there's no way I'm doing that. It could have slipped their minds, they had 6 weeks to RSVP and I can see how they could have forgotten. What I don't understand is why people who know they are coming right away don't RSVP right away. I mean, why wait? When you could easily forget. THe nice thing about doing the phone number and website are if people remember today, I'll know today. Also Marty's family is giving us our couple's shower tomorrow so anyone in his family that hasn't responded can be asked tomorrow. I am rather anxious about the number though. I have to have the final head count to the caterer by Friday. Plus I only have enough center pieces and chairs to accommedate 130 people and right now there still could be 146 so I might have to make a couple more center pieces and reserve more chairs. Luckily I made 150 candles (24 are etched but need the gel, Mom & I are doing those tomorrow) so no worries there. I just want to know and it's driving me crazy. Today would be a good day to try out the vallium because I am rather anxious. Doing my own wedding has changed my purspective on how I RSVP for weddings. Unless I don't know about one or both of us being able to go, I'm going to RSVP right away. Now that I know what brides go through.

By the way, I'm checking my email every 5 minutes to see if anyone RSVPed.

So Much

2005-08-17T15:32:00.000-07:00

It amazes me all the time all the little stuff that still needs to be taken care of for the wedding. I had my practice hair appointment and first gown fitting last night. It was cool to have my hair all done and see it with the dress. We have a couple changes for the hair. We're going to do it a little higher and do a suttle part like I had for Erika's wedding. The tiara looked funny with a real obvious part. The lady doing my hair said the funniest thing to me after about an hour of talking to her while she was working. I said something about being a real high stress person and she said I didn't strike her as a high stress person. I thought she was being sarcastic, but she wasn't. I guess the drugs must really be working because in the past people have noticed this about me after about 5 minutes of talking to me. So, it was strange, but good. Made me laugh too. After the fitting I went home. Half an hour, 4 rubberbands and 47 bobby pins later I had my hair down.

After having some dinner I wrapped the gifts for the ladies in the wedding party. I did some little embossing on the paper, to which I know you thinking, "why are you expending so much energy on something that doesn't matter?" Well, it actually only took 5 minutes pre-package, which is probably how long it would have taken to make a nice bow.

Anyway, back to the point. I keep thinking of little things that need to get done, like wrapping the gifts and I have to buy panty hose. A whole bunch of little crap that I all of a sudden realize still needs to be done. I'm feeling good though, stuff is getting done. My mom is coming this weekend for the couple's shower Marty's family is giving us and she is going to stay to help with stuff. Then the following weekend, the last weekend, will be spent cleaning and finishing crap. She offered to come for that too and I of course said OKAY! If anyone else wants to come that weekend too that would be awesome! You wouldn't think it would take that long to clean a house, but it really does and the house needs a real good cleaning. I'm working on keeping things clean once I get them clean, so hopefully this will be a great start to that end.

Oh and we picked our first dance song. I gave Marty a bunch to choose from without telling him who sang them and he picked "Face of Love" by Jewel.

Bachelorette Party

2005-08-16T12:51:00.000-07:00

Hey All,

I'm back!!! It's been, what 5 days with no posts? Crazy, so unlike me.

This weekend was my bachelorette party. I knew I was going to be gone so I utilized my time and finished all my stuff in the kitchen Friday night/ Saturday morning. So Erika and I had lunch at like noon and then we took off. We arrive in Wisconsin Dells at like 1:30. Liz and Gwyn joined up to drive together and were supposed to get there at about 2. They had all kinds of delays including exploding cans of pop and very bad driving directions so they didn't get there until 3:30. So Erika and I killed time doing some shopping and mostly just sitting around talking. We were on a wood bench so my butt fell asleep a couple times, but other than that it wasn't too bad waiting. Once they arrived we began playing mini golf. They took me to Pirates Cove Adventure Golf, which is this huge mini golf attraction. There are three different courses, one easy, one medium, and one difficult. Being adults and all we went for meduim difficulty. The first couple holes were medium I'd say, but then we hit one of those that you have to hit the ball part way up, but not so hard that it comes back down. There were several groups ahead of us because no one understood the 6 stroke maxium. So we were able to watch techniques and when it was finally our turns we actually did pretty well. We did 18 holes and had a good time. I did terribly I kept getting to the 6 hits and I hit it off of the coarse a couple times.

After that we went took off to the hotel with was a ways from downtown. We got there and got checked in. Liz is breast feeding so she had to pump. Erika, Gwyn and I walked down to a gas station and got some more pop. Between the gas station and the hotel there was an Uno's Chicago Eatery. They had a menu outside so we took a look and decided to eat there. We got Liz and went to eat. They had me wear a veil along with the shirt that said Bride on it. I was kind of disappointed because no one at the restruart said said anything about it. We went back to the hotel and they gave me gifts. It was so funny, Erika and Liz both got me night gowns and they both got me exactly the same one. I won't go into the other gift from Erika, but to say it made me laugh for a good 15 minutes. We played some games. Uno, Ponce, and some other games, some were very interesting. Erika and Liz fell asleep at about 11 and Gwyn and I went out into a secluded part of the hall and talked until 5 AM. When I finally did go to bed I slept with Erika and without going into it there was so much resltessness on her part that I got up at 8 because I couldn't take it anymore. Once everyone else was up we checked out and went to IHOP for breakfast. Man I love IHOP, yummmm...stuffed french toast. Then sadly it was time to part ways and Erika brought me back to La Crosse. It was a lot of fun, just too short like all weekends anymore. I went to bed at 7:30 Sunday because I was so tired. I'm starting to feel more awake finally. Anyway I should end this so it isn't too long.

Headache

2005-08-12T09:35:00.000-07:00

Well I'm not feeling the best today. I went home yesterday and took a nap, which would have been very nice except that I woke up feeling all weird. You know that weird feeling like you woke up at the wrong time. My heart was just pounding and my head felt all funny. So I did a few things then I watched the Packer game, throw out a whole bunch of stuff then I went to bed, hoping sleeping again would fix my head. Well it might have except that I woke up at like 5 this morning then my brain just started going. It decided it was time to figure out the schedule for the wedding day. So it got that all sorted out and I fell back asleep forgetting the plan I lost sleep over. So then I sent the rest of the morning until it was time to get up in a state of half awake thinking about crap. So I'm really tired and my head hurts. I'm trying to not have caffine as much as possible because the pop has so much sodium that I get all blooty. I know the one week I went without pop entirely I lost like 5 lbs and I'm sure it was water weight. So no pop yesterday or today. I'm sure I'll have tons at my bachelorette party tomorrow, but at least I'll be awake and in good spirits. I'm rather crabby today due to being sleeply.

Withdrawl

2005-08-11T09:16:00.000-07:00

My Sims 2 withdrawl continues. I found myself playing Freecell the last couple nights. What's with that? I mean I like Freecell, it was one of my addictions during college, but I don't play it anymore, not really at least. I went to my computer saw I had no email so instead of getting up and going to bed I had to waste 15 minutes playing. Maybe I don't intellectually stimulated right now. Work is boring to say the least and perhaps the sims 2 is a good little exercise for my brain. Now I know you're saying, "How is a game where you tell little fake people to eat, sleep, and pee intellectually stimulating?" Well, if you've never played the Sims 2, it's a lot more complicated than that. Plus I usually have at least 6 sims in a household, and at least one is a toddler. So trust me, trying to manage that many sims is intellectually stimulating. Most of what I'm doing around the house has been more on the physical side and so my poor brain is feeling flabby. Maybe that's why I've been so tired lately. I mean tiling a counter top & back splash has it's intellectual parts, there is measuring and whatnot, but then you put down the thinset and the spacers and blah blah blah. It's like walking a block and then taking a ten minute break, then walking another block and so on. Don't get me wrong, tiling was far from my least favorite remodeling project, at least it was satisfying in the end. Anyway, so I'm craving something to stimulate my brain...please!!!

Video

2005-08-10T14:02:00.000-07:00

Well I've on the video of pictures of Marty and I growing up for the wedding. I'm almost done, just a few more hours to put in. So after I got the pictures from me growing up in order and set with effects where appropriate I decided to watch it through in order to make sure everything made sense. Now keep in mind that I don't even have the music added in yet, but I got very weepy. It's strange because they were happy pictures, mostly with my family for the earlier years then more and more with friends the older I got. It was interesting to look at the pictures and see who I was with and who had their arms around me. The really strange thing was I had borrowed a bunch of pictures from Gwyn to scan in and use and I didn't even remember a lot of these events happening. Or more precisely not to remember things that happened at events. Like at Kimmie's graduation party. I apparently spent most of it sitting around playing old school Nintendo, which until I saw the pictures I had no reckolection of doing whatsoever. I just remember the things that I had pictures of happening. They say a picture is worth a thousand, but apparently it's worth a whole lot more to me. There are very few good things in my life that I remeber that I don't have any pictures of. My brain stores the info because once i see the pictures I remember it happening after a little while, but without the visual assistance the door's looked. I feel really bad about one instance in particual. That is Gwyn said the first tiem she and I ever really did anything, basically just the two of us was when my mom, Gwyn and I went to the Waupaca Show together. Now I vaguely remember going, I know my basket I wove was in it, but I don't remember anyone else going with, including my mom by the way. This was obviously a meaningful event for her because she remembers it what 10 years later. Apparently a deer tried to hit us too, which you'd think I would remember due to my track recond, but I don't at all. If I'm having this much trouble remembering stuff at 26, what's it going to be like when I'm 40? I guess I'll just have to have a camera with me at all times and annoy people even more.

2005-08-10T10:07:00.000-07:00

How do you keep your heart from breaking everytime someone says they aren't coming to your wedding?

Sims

2005-08-10T10:05:00.000-07:00

Okay, so this is pretty sad, but I miss my Sims. I've been very good about not playing. I've only played 3 hours in the past 4 weeks. Normally I could do that in an evening easily! I really must be a Simaholic. I crave playing. It's strange to miss something that isn't real. And people wonder why I don't drink... see I get addicted to a video game and there are far less negative reprocussions from playing a game. It's funny to get attached to characters on a screen, but if you think about I get attached to TV and movie characters and I spend far less time with them. Plus I can't control those charactors verses in the sims 2 I tell them who to love and when to try to have childern, what job to have and when to study. Everyone at work laughs at me, but I don't care. I'm even upset when they die except Ricky... man I hated that guy. I of course name them after people I know in real life too, which makes it harder to let them die. I do think it's funny when I use people's real astrological signs and then I can't get them to fall in love with their real life spouces. I have started to make them not quite so true to life. In the Royal Kingdom Challenge there is a Gwynndolynn, a Shaun, a Kimberly, a William, a Patricia, a Rachel, and a Marty and there are many others in other neighborhoods. The only one that I really can't seem to let do whatever is the Rachel. The King is a romance Sim and so he is woohooing with most the ladies in the kingdom. I want him to start up with Rachel, be she is married to Marty. I must let go of the control! Anyway, I really want to play just a little, but I won't let myself because the wedding is so close now. Yes, we're getting stuff done, but until it's all done I must be strong.

Why did Rachel disappear?

2005-08-09T11:42:00.000-07:00

Well Hi All,

I hope someone is actually reading this and I'm not just sending this stuff out to the universe for nothing. So some people have probably been wondering what happened to me, why I disappeared for such a long time. And it's funny to me because it's not like it happened one day, not like I woke up and decided that I was going to seclude myself. If you know me well enough to actually care to read this, then you probably know about the mental illness issues I had in high school and part of college. Well, I haven't had problems with depression for quite some time now, which is great of course. Everything was fine right after graduation. Marty and I moved into a duplex and I was able to get everything a place. We had lots of free time and everything was good. The house was almost always clean or at leasted on a regular basis.

Well, then about a year later we bought a house and that's when things started to fall apart. If you know me at all, you know that my... hummm... quirks come out more the more stressed I am. There were so many projects to do to update the house that I was never really able to find homes for things and stuff just piled up. My OCD overwhelmed me to the point of in-action. I actually didn't realize until recently that was what the problem was until I was watching Oprah one day and there was a woman on there about a hundred times worse than me. She couldn't find the prefect place for anything so she just left stuff everywhere. Then the piles overwhelmed her and she couldn't figure out where to start. Also she was so wrapped up in whether she would need something someday again that she couldn't get rid of stuff. I said, "that's my problem!" With having so many rooms being remodeled I couldn't put things where they went so they ended being in the wrong rooms cluttering them up too. Of course finally knowing the reason helped me. I realized that was why the kitchen had been sitting in utter disrepair for nearly 3 years. If I couldn't do it perfectly I couldn't do it at all. The sanding of the cabinets was such a dissapointment that I couldn't pick up the sander anymore (stupid vinnear). It was Very hard for me to come to the invitial conclusion that they weren't going to work vanished because the sanding had gone through the vinnear in some places so painting was the only option. I am glad now that I did finally act. The room is so close to being done and it's beautiful. Clean Sweep is also very theroputic for me as well.

Now my other problem is harder to pin point when it started. I've never liked calling people on the phone that I don't know. My one professor in college used to make me call people and ask for art donations to try to get me over it, but it didn't work. I was never one to speak up in class or in front of a group, it was just too terrifing. At some point I got to where I wouldn't even call people that I do know. Now I've always had problems with anxiety, at least for as long as I can remember. They definately got worse after I got engagement, just with everything that had to be done. So that added to my stress which added to everything else. I mean I was having panic attacks over a year ahead of time. Then a little over a year ago I realized something that was really quite scarey. I was having a really hard time leaving myself house by myself unless I was going to work. If I was in a store and someone else was in the aisle I needed to go down I would wait for them to leave before I would go down it. I was in my friend Erika's Wedding last summer and she had the ladies walk up the aisle by themselves. I was so frightened that I almost didn't go. The minister had to ask me if I was okay because I was shaking so much. I realized that this had happened very slowly, but it had come to a point of descision. Either I could continue going the way I was and get to the point that I was basically a shut in or I could go in to see my doctor. I went to my doctor because that was not the way I wanted to live. She put me on Paxil which helped some. I was only able to take half of what she wanted me too because it was messing with my sleep. So it helped, but not as much as I wanted. She told me I could try going up again at anytime that I thought I needed it. About a month ago I did. It's so strange, maybe not, but I've noticed such a difference. I will actually talk to cashiers and have a little conversation. I'm not nervous when I talked to my friends anymore. I would get nervous or anxious to talk to Liz and Erika. What's with that? Anyway things are getting better. The more I get accomplished in the house and for the wedding the less anxious I feel.

I don't like the fact that I have to take a drug to feel normal, but if it's between taking something so I feel normal or not and feeling the way I did... I'll pick the drugs everytime. So now that you all think I'm completely crazy, I should go.

Yep Me Again

2005-08-09T10:23:00.000-07:00

Yes this is my second post today. The last one was so long I didn't think it was a good idea to keep going.

So I finished the programs for the wedding last night!!! I'm very excited, checked lose puppies right off the list. Special thanks go out to my friends Gwyn and Tara and my mom. Without them I would be working on them until the day before the wedding. They turned out really nice. They are however the longest wedding programs in the history of mankind! They are 6" x 6" so the pages are letter page folded in half, trimed to fit, printed front and back. There are 16 small pages. We wrote a little something about everyone standing up in the wedding, the story of how we met and how he proposed, then there are the games. Yes, there are two games. Marty & Rachel Trivia, which I'm interested to see how Erika and Liz do at those since they were there for a lot of the stuff. I have the answers in there for that one so people can learn stuff about us if they don't know the answers. I also made up a word jumble. It's amazing what you can do for free on the internet. We've been to a lot of weddings where we pretty much just know each other, so I thought I'd give people something to do between the ceremony and dinner. I made 125 of them which I'm hoping will be enough, but not every person always gets one, a lot of times couples will share.

We have 43 people coming so far, 12 not, and 116 still to RSVP. Of course all the not coming people are my people except one that is a both. What can you do? You can't force them to come. We only invited people we really wanted there so hopefully most of those who haven't responded yet will come.

My goal was to make this the most personal wedding possible. We've gone to some that we don't really know the person that our friend is marrying and we've left knowing nothing more about the person than when we came. So, we didn't want that to happen. I think if anyone leaves without learning something about one of us, then they just aren't paying attention. I hope people enjoy everything I've done because it really has taken a lot of time and energy. I just have to finish up the video and make a few more candles and then I'll finally be done!

This Saturday is my bachelorette party! I'm excited to see what Erika has planned for me and see what she's had under her hat for what a year? She is picking me up at noon on Saturday and taking me some where. That's about all I know. You know no one has ever planned anything for me like this before. This is very cool!

Walking

2005-08-08T15:11:00.000-07:00

I'm about to get on the treadmill for the millionth time. I walk 3 miles at a time, 5 days a week and I'm sick of it. It's just soooo boring! It seems like I only really start to see results at 6 or 7 days a week and I've been too busy to walk for an hour every single day. During the week I'm good, but the weekends never seem to pan out. My left heel is killing me right now, not sure what i did, I just know it hurts. the left ankle hurts too, that comes and goes every few weeks. I think I'm just carrying too much weight. I'm so pissed about getting pneumonia last October. I was down nearly 20lbs, but I was so sick I couldn't workout for over 3 months so I gained it all back. I think I'm down a whooping 2 lbs right now, but the seamstress is going to have to let out the waist in my wedding dress that fit me prefectly when I bought it. I'm so frustrated I could cry. Seriously do I have to walk 4 miles 5 days a week? I don't know that I could, that's a darn long ways and if I walk 6 days a week again am I going to get the house ready by the wedding?

Anyway, I've been complaingin about walking for 7 minutes now, I guess I had better start.

Old Friends

2005-08-03T17:38:00.000-07:00

Old friends have been on my mind lately with planning the wedding and who to invite and who will actually come. When I'm speaking of old friends I'm talking about the ones that you lose touch with. The ones that nothing happened that made us stop talking. In some ways it would be easier if something had happened because then one person can chose to appologize or forgive but when nothing happened except time, it makes it harder. There are some of these friends that you see again and they aren't afraid that you are going to not want to talk to them. It's easy to get things going again because as the recipient you figure they really are happy to see you and really was just time, distance and everyday life stuff that got in the way. But if neither person knows what happened or they are both fearful that the other doesn't want to know them again, what do you do? You can't just say, "What's new?" because everything is new. You go along everyday living your life and you realize one day that you don't even know the other person any more. It was never your intention, but you wonder if it was their's. Things are strange when you see them because you don't know if they feel the same desire to get to know them again or if they are happier without you in their life.

You wonder if the other person knows the true intent behind you contacting them or if they just think you want something. Like inviting them to the wedding if they think you just want a gift. I can say in my case that is not fact. We only invited people to the wedding that we really wanted there, whether they are currently strong forces in our lives or someone we want to be strong forces. With some people I just not know how to make it not strange anymore...any ideas?

All Aboard the Anxiety Train to Crazyville

2005-07-28T14:11:00.000-07:00

I had my annual appointment with my doctor this morning. All the physical stuff went well. We talked about the Paxil that I've been on for a year now. She had oringally prescribed 20mg, but I wasn't dreaming on that so I was taking 10 mg instead. A few weeks back I was feeling really stressed so I tried the 20mg again since she said I could try it again if I wanted. Things have been somewhat better and I've even noticed a difference since I went up again to the 20. I still have a hard time talking to people I don't know very well, but at least I can leave the house alone again without feeling like the world was caving in on me. We talked about how things are better, but with the wedding coming up I am still a lot more anxious then I would ideally like to be. I don't know if it's a normal amount or not, but when people look at you like you're nuts I figure it's not. She told me I can go up 30 mg in a couple weeks if the 20 isn't helping enough and of coarse to make sure 30 doesn't sadate me too much. I also told her about my performance anxiety for the big day so she gave me a prescription for vallium, yes that's right vallium! That way I have it for the day just in case. She wants me to try it before then too, once again to make sure it doesn't sadate me so much that I won't know what's going on. That would be a bad way to spend my wedding day. I could have used it yesterday, I had a nice little panic attack and that was just because I have my practice hair do next week.

Man I wish I could handle stress better. I'm sure it's genetic though because both my parents are the same way. I mostly got the social anxiety disorder from my mom and they both have general anxiety problems. I hate having to use a pill to keep myself well, but it's better than becoming a shut-in or just feeling crazy all the time.

Marty actually can keep me pretty calm when I'm around him. Of course it's also worse at work because I'm not getting anything done that needs to be done, but I sure do think about it.

Your love is just the antidote when nothing else will cure me
There are times I cant decide when I cant tell up from down
You make me feel less crazy when otherwise I'd drown
But you pick me up and brush me off and tell me I'm OK
Sometimes thats just what we need to get us through the day
-Sarah McLachlan "Push"

Stressed

2005-07-27T07:36:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm feeling the stress today. I have so much to do this week and so little time. Two of the four full time people at my store are gone the rest of the week which means I can't leave early despite having all my work done. There just aren't enough hours in the evening. My first problem is i decided to do tab curtains in the kitchen and they take like 3 times as long to sew. I finally finished one of the four planels last night and I was supposed to give my mom back her sewing machine last weekend, but I wasn't done so I told her this next weekend. Second, we borrowed two video cameras for my bridal shower so I could do a video for Liz since she couldn't be there. SO that means lots of editing so the two mesh together nicely. I'm hoping she'll be feeling up to it and I'll go visit her and little Miss Ella on Sunday on my way back from Point. Which would mean I'd have to get that done too. Now my mom didn't get to do a scrapbook page for me at my shower, so we were going to do that Saturday night, but Patty wants to have a little party. So, I am hoping to get out early on Friday so I can go to Point and my mom and I can do pages Friday night instead, but I have to find out if one of the part timers can come in early and if so when, ahhhhh!!!!

I know I'll be able to get all the wedding projects done at this point, but I'm not sure about getting the house clean and organized. It just seems like so much to do in so little time. 5.5 weeks to go!!!!

Bridal Shower and Weekend

2005-07-26T11:51:00.000-07:00

This past weekend was my bridal shower. My mom and Gwyn came together Friday night. Due to some prescription insanity they didn't get here until after 7. We had to hurry out of the house to get to Hobby Lobby before they closed at 8. We needed more plain paper. Liz had sent a lot of fancy stuff with my mom, but we need basics too and an embossing gun. Hobby Lobby didn't have the best selection on paper so we rushed over to a scrapbooking shop not too far from there and got in the door 5 minutes before they were closing. They had a ton of great stuff. We also went to Micheal's which luckily stays open until 9. I think we got ink or something there, that I don't really remember, it was such a blur. We then had to drive down to the south side Walgreens to finish the prescription insanity and finally got home at nearly 9. Fortunately I had called Marty from Walgreens so he had dinner almost ready so we all ate before we starved to death. By this point my mom was tired so she went to bed while Gwyn and I went to Festival Foods to pick up the stuff to make sweet salad. We got back and made that. There were issues with getting the cool-whip to melt, but Gwyn suggested whisking it, and that worked. I think it was close to 1:00 by the time we got to bed. I couldn't sleep so I got up and made a veil, tiara and bouquet for my bride bear.

Saturday was an early morning. I woke up an hour before my alarm because I was so excited. My mom was already up. We worked on getting ready and getting everything around. Marty's friend Tonya dropped off the shower cake. She did a practice run for the wedding cake by doing the swirl hearts on the sides. It turned out beautifully. Then we ran to Micheal's again because I realized I had gotten clear embossing ink instead of silver. Turns out the silver is really hard to find so we went with silver powder instead. We then rushed to Festival to pick up all the food and a few other estensals. Finally back to house to pick up everything because we didn't want the cake frosting melting in the car while we were shopping and then headed down to the hotel. While we were unloading the car I realized that it was pretty much a waste of time doing my hari and makeup that morning because the heat recked it all, fortunately I was smart and brought all that stuff with and just wore regular clothes to decorate. AT that point was when I really started to feel overwhelmed. We had tons of bags of stuff for scrapbooking and decorations and food that all needed to be put in certain places and trying to figure out how to do that was blowing my mind. Luckily my mom and Gwyn remained calm and Erika showed up shortly after we started and she was calm as well. Somehow we got everything set up with just enough time for my mom and I to change and get ready before people showed up.

My relatives all drove together and Marty's mom got there at the same time so it was a giant on solt of people. Three other people had RSVPed yes, but never showed, so including my mom and I there were only 11 people there. Which was a little disappointing, but what are you going to do? People had other plans or couldn't get off work or couldn't see driving many, many hours just for a couple hours. That's the way major events have always gone for me, so I guess I shouldn't have been surprised. It was hard though because I gave everyone 7 months notice in hopes they could make it. I just need to not let these things bother me. Liz ended up not being able to come. She is still really limited in modelity from the c-section and driving over 3 hours each way with a 2 week old didn't seem like the best idea for anyone. It was very weird not having her there.

We had one game, "How well d o you know the Bride?". It was a bunch of random mutiple choose questions. Some of them were hard for me to answer, so I don't know how anything esle got them right. Gwyn won with 9 correct, Erika, my cousin Nicole and my Aunt Linsey all came in with 8. Then we ate. My mom had gotten enough food to feed a small army, so we have a ton left. We won't need to cook for the next 2 weeks.

Next we did gifts. It was determined that I open too slowly and talk too much, but I was taking my time since there weren't a whole ton to open. Here's what we got.
Gwyn: Purple Heather Sheet Set and Rode/Towel Hook
Erika: Rest of the Charming Tails Bridal Party (discontinued in 2000), Cookbook Holder, Chicken Cookbook
My Mom: Scrapbook (No surprise there since I told her to get it for me)
Marty's Mom and sister: Silverware Set and Home Depot Gift Card
Grandma Mary: Personalized Cake Pan
Aunt Linsey, Uncle Phil, & Cousin Cooper: Scatagories
Aunt Shelly, Unle Brian, Cousins Nicole and Emily: George Foreman Grill
Melissa (mailed in): Wedding Anniversary Book (to fill in every year)
Patty/Joan (Sent with Gwyn): Iced Tea Maker
Grandma Elsie (who died when I was in junior high): A Towel she had crocheted a basket on

My favorite part was the scrap book project. Everyone made a page that all I have to do is come back after the wedding and add pictures to. Erika and Linsey were really the only one's that have ever done scrapbooking so it was cool that everyone else learned to do it too. I also got to teach my grandma how to emboss which I have only recently learned to do from Liz. I helped my cousin Emily make her page since she is a little too young to do it herself. My mom and I didn't get to do our pages so I think we are going to try to do our pages after Patty's shower Saturday.

Before we knew it, it was time to start cleaning up. That took almost an hour too. We video taped the whole time so Liz could experience too. Now I just have to try to get it edited and authored. We went back to the house and relaxed for a bit since we were all exhausted. We ate dinner and got the video off the camera my mom had borrowed from work. My mom went to bed and Gwyn and I worked on making the programs. We got 37 nearly done. We ended up staying up until 4 AM. Which I have since determined I am too old to do anymore.

Sunday Marty and I ran arrends and spent sometime getting the gifts homes. I worked on grouting some more, and I'm finally almost done with that!

Lunch Break

2005-07-19T13:25:00.000-07:00

So here I am on my lunch break. Work is pretty quiet for me now. I've been skipping out early as much as possible to get stuff done in the kitchen and for the wedding. 45 days to go and still lots to do. It feels manageable at this point at least. Once I get the kitchen done Maybe I will be able to relax a little.

This Saturday is my Bridal Shower. I'm very excited and a little nervous, but when am I not a little (or a lot) nervous? Not a ton of people could make it, but we're looking at about 14 or so with my mom and me. I think I'm the most interested to see what games my mom and Liz came up with. I'm a shower game nerd. I pretty much always win at least once. Of course I can't win anything at my own, but I might play along just to see how I do, if I can that is. I'm the most anxious to see if Liz can come. She ended up having to have a c-section on the 9th in order to get Ella into the world (she was just too comfortable in there). I really hope she is feeling up to it. Erika talked to her yesterday and siad she was doing pretty well. I'll just have to wait and see...something I'm not the best at.

Speaking of waiting, my bachlorette party invites went out awhile back so everyone invtied now knows where I am being taken and what we are going to do except me. Oh my God is that ever driving me crazy! AND I don't even get to know who is coming until we are on our way. Man that Erika knows how to drive me crazy. I'm sure she is enjoying it. I do know one person that is coming and one that isn't because they told me. It's one of those situtations where I want to know, but I don't want to know. I like surprises but the longer I have to think about them the more likely I'll figure it out. Marty hates that, I do it with presents all the time. Erika hasn't really said much, unlike what Marty usually does, so if I were to guess it would be a total out of the blue guess.

What Brings You Joy?

2005-07-19T07:00:00.000-07:00

What in your life brings you joy? I don't mean family or friends. I mean what is it that you love to do? What relaxes you?

For me, it's my flower garden. Not so much the planting and tending process, but more the watching them grow and bloom. I love taking pictures of them. To see the way light shines through the petals. To abstract them and enjoy the art of the way the petals lay across each other and how them sway in the breeze.

Last night I got home and the light was perfect to get great shots of them. I have over 350 pictures of the me so far. Some are your basic snapshot, but others are so beautiful they make me want to cry.

There are of course other things that bring me joy, this is just the one I have been thinking about lately.

Here I am

2005-07-18T21:26:00.000-07:00

Here I am making my first post. What fun. I'm tired and probably should be doing something constructive with my time. There are still a few tiles to be layed in the kitchen and I haven't had dinner yet. I can't wait for the kitchen to finally be done. I mean I started it almost 3 years ago. Maybe I'm lazy, but I think it's the over achiever in me that is afraid of failing. If I can't do something "right", I don't want to do it at all. I hate to start something that I don't know if I can finish. I went into the kitchen remodel expecting it to take maybe one weekend. Some 50 hours of sanding later i knew that was wrong. It became an overwhelming burden for over 2.5 years. I set myself free when I decided to paint those losely cabinets. the counters are taking far longer than I expected too, but I at least feel like I'm making progress.